touchable i am,
lovable i am not.
touchable and unlovable
a vast combination that is me.
for i can be touched
i can let someone touch my every part
even the depths of my soul
they reach and they grab
out it comes, sticky black will coat their hands
but maybe that black was already there before
and i just didn't see it.
unlovable, i have had it screamed at me,
my lover(s) will not give it a rest,
i'm almost utterly convinced it's her favorite word.
it is all there, the dialectic of being
touchable yet unlovable.
maybe one day
i can be more than just something to touch,
i can be someone to love instead.
