what is it that makes people so alluring?
that i could fall in love and still be
thinking about her three years later.
each summer, she came back to me
she told me she never fell out of love
and that she never meant to hurt me.
i believed her and let her eclipse me
so grateful for the light she brought
even though i knew it would end in my own darkness.
and it does.
every time.
this year, we exchanged cordial happy new year's
and this year,
she said she is done with me.
she said what we had has been ruined
and that she doesn't waste her time thinking about it or me.
i wish i could do the same.
i wove my love for her into a threadbare blanket
and maybe one day i will be brave enough
to throw it out.
i'm not sure if it's love anymore,
but i know for sure that it is something.