his one wish || a mattia x kairi story.

heartbreak | kairi

TO SAY THAT KAIRI WAS LOST WITHOUT MATTIA would be an understatement. Don't get him wrong - he loved the other boys with all his heart, but Mattia was his best friend. No one compared to Mattia and Kairi missed him. Even though Mattia was breaking Kairi's heart more and more each day, he couldn't help but still love him.

Everyday became a blur to Kairi, as if he was walking in someone else's shadow. He felt empty, even when he was hanging out with his friends. Kairi would still have fun, and he was grateful for the other New Jersey boys for giving him that happiness, but it just wasn't the same. Alejandro would routinely ask Kairi if he was okay, and each time the answer was the same.

"Kairi, you there?" Alejandro waved his hand in front of Kairi's face. Him, Kairi, Alvaro, and Roshaun were all hanging out at Kairi's house, making TikToks as they always did after school.

"What? Oh, yeah, I'm good," Kairi blinked rapidly, his mind had drifted elsewhere. Alejandro pursed his lips and raised an eyebrow.

"You sure? You don't seem good," Alejandro observed.

"Alejandro, I said I'm fine," Kairi insisted, raising his voice slightly in frustration. When he saw the surprised looks of his friends, he sighed and forced a smile. "I promise, I'm okay."

He often found himself thinking about Mattia, wondering what he was up to. Mattia had disappeared from social media, and Kairi only caught glimpses of the Italian boy in the hallways of highschool. Whenever Kairi saw his ex-friend in the hallways, Mattia looked so different. There wasn't a smile in sight, and would often hide in his hoodie, something Mattia rarely did. Kairi never let his gaze rest on Mattia too long, or else Mattia would notice and things would be more awkward than they already were.

One day, as Kairi was leaving school, he saw Mattia hanging out by someone's locker. Intrigued and slightly confused, he stayed back, pretending to go on his phone. A few minutes later, Mattia's ex-girlfriend Jenny appeared, and they greeted each other with a tight hug. Mattia suddenly seemed... happier, and Kairi didn't know why. That bitch had ruined Mattia's life for months on end, and now suddenly they were great friends? Something was all wrong.

Kairi watched as the two of them talked to each other, their voices low, before they hugged once more, and Jenny departed. Once she had, Kairi walked straight up to Mattia, at his wit's end.

"What the hell was that?" Kairi gestured the way Jenny had left, looking up at Mattia with an incredulous look on his face.

"I don't know what you mean," Mattia rolled his eyes, "and why are you even talking to me anyways? I thought I told you to stay away."

"Are you serious? You're talking to her again? Do you forget what she did to you?" Kairi completely ignored Mattia's comments, raising his voice.

"I don't believe this is any of your business," Mattia countered, glaring down at his ex-friend.

"Mattia, I can't stand by and watch you get hurt again by that bitch!"

"What the fuck is your problem, Kairi? This is none of your business," Mattia took a step closer to Kairi, "and even if it was, who are you to tell me who I can and can't hang out with?" Kairi studied Mattia's face for a moment, trying to discern what the hell Mattia was doing.

"Because I'm your friend!" Kairi exclaimed.

"WE ARE NOT FRIENDS!" Mattia roared. He stepped closer to Kairi, causing the smaller boy to step back. They repeated this until Kairi was backed up against the wall on the other side of the hallway.

"You are not my friend. I told you to stay away from me, and I thought that the message was loud and clear, but apparently not." Mattia drew in close to Kairi's face until they were merely inches apart.

"You aren't the Mattia I know," Kairi whispered, a fierce stare meeting Mattia's own.

"And how would you know 'the Mattia I am?'" Mattia mocked his words, rolling his eyes yet again, "you barely talk to me anymore. You don't even try to," a quick flash of sadness took over Mattia's eyes, but it was gone within a second. Kairi couldn't believe the words that were spilling from Mattia's mouth. Did the apology mean nothing?

"Because I know you," Kairi responded softly, "I know that you needed space."

"You have no idea what I needed," Mattia hissed, his eyes narrowing.

"Well if you had told me, maybe I would have," Kairi retorted, "but you decided that disappearing off the face of this Earth would be better than telling any of us what you needed." He brushed past Mattia, standing in the middle of the hallway with his arms crossed.

"Kairi, you know why -" Mattia was cut off by an angry Kairi.

"Do I, Mattia?" He asked quickly, eyebrows raised. No response came from the other boy. "That's what I thought." Kairi straightened himself out before speaking again.

"I know that the video getting leaked was hard for you. I know I said stupid shit that I didn't mean but I tried to make it right," Kairi's voice broke ever so slightly, "but I never left your side, not once. You made the choice to distance yourself, you made the choice to ignore everyone around you. You made the choice to do whatever you're doing with your ex-girlfriend. I respected all of your decisions, even though I disagreed with every single one of them."

"So forgive me for not knowing why you didn't talk to any of us," Kairi said sarcastically, "forgive me for saying that you're not the Mattia I know." He looked Mattia in his eyes as he said this, searching for some sign of a challenge, some way that Kairi could know that Mattia even remotely regretted everything he had done. But there was nothing, Mattia merely did what he usually did: steeled himself from every word that Kairi had said.

The moment Kairi saw Mattia's reaction, Kairi began blinking quickly to fight off the tears that were destined to fall. Mattia opened his mouth to speak, seeing his friend's reaction. Little did Kairi know that Mattia's heart was breaking too.

"I'm sorry," were the only words that came from his mouth, his eyes averted to the ground. The smaller boy didn't say anything at first.

"I know," Kairi whispered finally, wishing that Mattia would just save himself. He was still giving Mattia the chance to undo everything that had happened between the two of them. Kairi desperately wanted things to go back to normal between the two of them. He missed their hang out sessions, he missed Mattia's ruthless teasing, he missed making TikToks with him - he just missed his best friend. Kairi had hoped that Mattia felt the same way.

But when no word came, Kairi got his answer.

Kairi turned to leave, but before he did, he said, "You'll be deleted from everything by tomorrow, you have my word." Kairi quickly shuffled out of the school, his heart breaking into a million little pieces, leaving the remains at Mattia's feet.

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a/n: i'm so so sorry omg i know this chapter was super emotional, it was for me to write too. it's on the shorter side but it still packs a punch

thanks for reading and making it this far! be sure to leave a comment/vote!! thank u for the continued support :)

until next time, mj <3