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L O L A K I S S I N G E R had quite a few issues in her life that were really beginning to piss her off. First of all, her problems probably began on the day she was born, when her parents decided to name her after a song by the Kinks about a male transvestite. Out of all the songs in the world to name a girl after (perhaps Rio by Duran Duran, Eleanor after Eleanor Rigby by the Beatles or she might have even been happy with having her namesake be Come On Eileen), her parents chose Lola, which she had to admit she was not too chuffed about.
S E C O N D L Y , her best friend and flatmate had asked her to leave their apartment for the night, so she could spend the night with her boyfriend alone, which Lola had to say she found quite irritating. This led her on to her third and fourth troubles.
T H R E E : after being told she couldn't sleep in her own home, she had gone to her boyfriend's house to spend the night there, only to find him in bed with another woman (who had the most irritating accent, which only made matters worse for her). This then quickly was followed up by issue number four... Lola Kissinger was in the local pub and absolutely pissed in both senses of the word: fuming that her boyfriend was such a prick and completely and utterly drunk, after drowning her sorrows away with a couple of pints of Guiness.
A N D A S I F her night couldn't get any worse, along came problem five: a man, who was even more intoxicated then she was, had started to make advances on her and she was way too far out of it to stop it. But then came the solution to problem number five, in the form of gorgeous, cocky Alex Turner, lead singer and frontman of the Arctic Monkeys, who managed to rescue Lola from her uncomfortable situation and solve her second issue of having nowhere to sleep for the night, kindly offering his apartment.
S O Y O U M I G H T be thinking that after having two of her problems sorted out, life is all good and dandy for Lola. Right? Wrong. Because there comes along massive problem number six - the worst of them all.
S L I C K , S M O O T H Alex Turner for some reason keeps reappearing in her life, no matter how hard she tries to get rid of him and she just can't help falling in love . . .
A N D neither can he.
❀ S t a r r i n g . . .
✧⁺❀ ━━━ ella purnell , LOLA KISSINGER ! ( a r a b e l l a . . . )
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