A Heist In Space With Markiplier ONE SHOTS

forgotten birthdays and expensive slaps (Illinois)

You did not know why you were still following this idiot into life-threatening situations.

Okay, you actually knew it. You just had nothing better to do and he was dumb enough to offer you a job. Other than that, you pretty much had a crush on him. Well, who wouldn't? He was handsome, educated and a real-life version of Indiana Jones. Only with more muscle.

You expected it to be one of those days when you risk your lives for an antique artifact. But something was different.

Your flight was without any turbulence, Illinois wasn't involved in any bar fights, and you were not hunted by any criminal organization. But the strangest thing was yet to come. You saw Illinois O'Connell without his precious hat, which he usually did not take off either while sleeping or while showering.

But now he was standing in front of you. Hair neatly combed back and dressed in a suit. This sight was unfamiliar. A pig walking on two legs looked righter than whatever this was.

"Illi? Are you all, right? Should I call a doctor?" You asked anxiously as you continue to mentally process his sight.

The adventurer just looked at you confused. "A doctor? What are you talking about?"

Instead of answering, you simply point to his suit with a look that was a mixture of confusion, astonishment, and horror.

Still confused, he looked down to find the reason for your strange behavior. It took him a moment to understand what you meant.

"Oh, the suit!"

Well, that had taken surprisingly long.

"I go to an auction and as much as I love my hat and my outfit, I thought it would be more appropriate to stick to the dress code," said the adventurer, as he straightened his bow tie.

An auction? If he makes himself so fancy, then it would have to be an auction for the higher social class. In short, the complete opposite of you. But that made you wonder.

You knew he had money. How else would he finance all the travels and give you a generous paycheck every month? But you never really thought about how much money he really had. Let alone how he earned it!

It was completely impossible that your adventures could finance all this, because after all you did not even know what he did with all the stuff you find. Does he donate it to a museum? Does he sell it? Does he keep it? If he keeps it, then where? Does he even have a permanent residence? Where does he come from? So many questions and hardly any answers.

You've known him for almost two years, but you knew so little about him. You did not even know his last name after four months.

This man was an Enigma and that made him even more attractive! If that was even possible.

"What kind of auction?" You asked curiously, as you could not imagine any sort of auction that Illinois would go to.

"An art collector died last month and now his family is auctioning off his collection."

"Art collectors? Since when have you been interested in art? "

You never had the impression that he was a fan of anything that would be classified as 'modern art'. The only art he seemed interested in was those whose ages were in the triple digits and started at least seven. Or the art which he saw every time in the mirror.

"I do not," he admitted. "I know from a safe source that he has collected valuable paintings as well as some ancient artifacts. I hope to find something special for my collection. "

So, he has a collection. Will he show it to you if you ask nicely?

"And what do I do in the meantime?" You ask. He certainly had a job that you could do during this time.