ELLI sat down on the chair next to the open window with a white rabbit stuff toy on her hands. She put her gaze outside and stare into space.
If anyone saw her right now, no one could ever tell what she's thinking about.
The gentle and cold wind blew the curtain and Elli's hair gently as it came inside Elli's room.
"What a nice weather..."
Elli slowly closes her eyes. Slightly parted her lips and begin humming a sad yet beautiful tune. Her voice is low but clear and cool.
She started gently patting the white rabbit stuff toy. Elli could hear a bright and lively laughter that made her happy as well. She opened her eyes and a pair of emerald eyes came into view. She looked back as she continued to humming.
And she saw a little girl who seems like 5 years old in her cute pink floral dress with her twin pigtails that enhanced her cuteness.
Elli gazed lovingly at the little girl however the girl remained on the spot but she was still smiling happily at her. Elli removed her hand that is petting the white rabbit and instead held out her hand to the little girl.
However the girl remained on her spot, still smiling. The happiness on Elli's eyes slowly dissipated and her hand that is held out, slowly fall down to her side. Her head slowly inclined down. Her body started losing its vigor, as if the happy Elli earlier was just an illusion.
"Even now..." she whispered, "You won't come to me... what must I do for you to come to me..." Elli whispered sadly as tears gushed out from her eyes. She didn't dare to lift her head because she doesn't want the little girl to see her weak and hopeless.
However, she was answered but silenced. Elli slowly lifted her head and looked at the spot where the girl stood but the little girl was already gone.
Elli bit her lower lip.
"And now you left me again." Elli removed her eyes from the spot where the girl stood earlier and instead buried her face in her hands as she cried her heart out. Only her heartbreaking cries could be the only thing to be heard.
"Why must you hate me...? I didn't mean it... It was them... it - it was them..."
Her crying became louder and leaned forward towards her legs as she continued to cry.
"Please forgive me... forgive me... forgive me baby..."
"Please come back to me... please come back to mommy, baby... Mommy loves you so much baby... so so much... so please come back to me..."
Suddenly she felt a cold yet refreshing sensation on her knees. She stopped crying because this touch... she clearly knew who this touch belongs to. She slowly removed her hands that are covering her face. Her eyes were wide in disbelief yet tears continued to stream down from them.
Then she saw her adorable and cute baby daughter in her pink floral dress with her pig-tails. More tears streamed down when she saw the sweet and bright smile of her very first child and daughter.
There was no resentment, anger or grief or any negative emotions on her face or eyes. Her daughter's pair of baby blue eyes only held innocence and pureness. So much innocence and pureness that it broke her heart to think and face the truth that her daughter in front of her... is already dead.
In front of her is the very soul of her beloved daughter that died during the car crash and it was because of her and her husband's arguing that their daughter died and only she remained alive. She couldn't stop the overflowing emotions inside her.
With shaky hands she slowly reached out and gently cupped the cold cheeks of her daughter. She opened her mouth but no words came out as tears keeps on falling. She was speechless.
"Oh baby..." Elli choked on her sobs and rested her forehead to her daughter's. Because she knew that this will be the last time that she will be able to do it.
She closed her eyes and prayed, "Please if this was a dream... please don't let me wake up anymore..."
Suddenly a pair of small hands also gently cupped her cheeks that made her snap her eyes open. And she saw her daughter's baby blue eyes.
Even without talking, Elli can perfectly tell what her daughter wanted to say. She cried harder as her body shook.
Elli could feel her body loosing its energy from crying but her shaky hands on her daughter's cheeks still remained there.
"Mommy loves you so much baby... mommy loves you so so... so much..."
"I am so blessed to have..." Elli intake a deep breath and closed her eyes, "I'm so blessed to have a daughter like you, baby... Mommy is so blessed... Mommy and Daddy are so blessed to have you..."
Without opening her eyes she felt a pair of strong yet somewhat warm arms embraced her from behind. Elli cried harder even more.
Elli was crying her heart out that she didn't heard the panic voices of her parents outside her room.
"We are also so blessed to have a wife and mother like yourself, honey..."
"We wab you, mom..."
Elli's heart and world completely shattered when she felt the presence and warmth of her husband and child disappeared around her. Her hands and body shook. Her cried became more heartbreaking as it contained her feelings and emotions.
