By the time we actually got to the room he wanted to show me, I had met two other men by the names Zayn and Louis, but I could feel the lovely compression of anxiety on my chest.
But I didn't dare announce that.
I just wanted to be left alone.
"So this is our guest room, the shower is in that door, that's the closet, the bed- do you want me to show you everything in the room?" He laughed out lightly, making me smile.
"You don't have to" I dismissed with a firm smile.
"Okay. Well I will be downstairs, if you need anything at all- just let me know" he smiled.
"Thank you" I smiled to him, seeing him nod before leaving the room.
I shut the door, letting my anxiety finally hit.
I paced for a few seconds, trying to get control of my breathing before it went too crazy.
I ended up sitting on the ground, putting my head to my knees, imagining hearing Luke's heart.
This night could not go any faster.
Eventually I got myself controlled enough to where I could shower.
I showered quickly, changing into one of Luke's shirts and a pair of shorts.
I braided my hair quickly, brushing my teeth and washing my face, before going back into the main part of the room.
I checked my phone, seeing a text from Luke
how u doin!
I knew he was intoxicated.
I'm good, you having fun?
As I waited, I plugged my phone in, laying on my stomach as I waited.
A lil to much. Want go hom, but the dd isn't a dd anymore
Do not drink and drive Luke, call an Uber if you need.
I wouldnt Van. Rlex. Wish you could b with us:(
I do too! But don't worry about me, I'm all good. Go have fun with the guys!
I will, I will. We b home soon. Love u.
I love you too, be safe❤️
I plugged my phone in, rubbing my face before hearing a small knock as the door opened.
"Just letting you know that we all are going to bed" Harry smiled to me, making me smile back.
"Have a good night" I responded with a smile.
"You too, if you need anything, my room it two doors down, just walk in and say my name" he spoke with a smile.
"Thank you" I responded, watching him leave the room.
Throughout the night I woke up to a tight feeling in my chest.
At five, the pain was so bad- I swore I was going into cardiac arrest.
I gripped my chest tightly, trying to breathe through it rather than having to wake anyone up.
But I knew- if I didn't get help soon, I'd be beyond the point of help.
I got up, feeling a dizzy spell.
I checked my phone, seeing one text from Like
4:30
jus got home, u not here:( cal says yo I went to the boys house, hop you don't love them more. I'll come get you ASAP you wake up
I knew he wouldn't be awake- he just went to sleep thirty minutes ago.
So I resorted to the one person that I didn't want to.
Harry
I went two doors down, seeing that the door was already partly open.
I entered, trying to make sure I could breathe enough to talk.
"Harry" I spoke, not too loud, but yet he immediately sat up- seeming oddly awake.
"What's wrong?" He asked, sitting up- his phone in hand, making me realize that he may have already been awake.
"I'm having anxiety- it's really bad" I managed to speak out, never letting go of my chest.
"Okay" he spoke immediately, turning his lamp on.
"How can I help you? What can I do?" He asked me, pulling the covers off of himself as I finally felt a tear slip down my cheek from the pain in my chest- which was only increasing .
The fact that I was having anxiety and couldn't control it myself was giving me even more anxiety.
"I don't know" my voice cracked as I spoke.
"I- do- I don't want to touch you and make it worse, but yet I feel the need to hug you" he spoke
I paced in front of him, trying to make an airway, but I was struggling.
"Can you take me home?" I cried out, seeing him click his phone.
"I don't think the guys will be waking up for several hours, but if you think that will make this better, I'll take you home, but I'm going to need proof that you're not going to die once I leave you alone there" he spoke firmly.
"Deal"
I grabbed all of my stuff, leaving with him.
The car ride home was even worse.
The seatbelt made me feel confined, there was early morning traffic, Harry didn't know how to comfort me and I felt horrible for not only making him drive me home at five in the morning, but also crying in his passenger seat over chest pains.
We got home and he came inside with me, watching me turn the alarms off.
I immediately felt relief when I saw the guys' shoes and jackets.
Now I just needed to be able to breathe for Harry to leave.
I tried to control it by myself for a few minutes, until I ended up doing something Luke taught me- an inhaler.
I went to the bathroom, finding it exactly where Luke put it for me, quickly doing one pump, letting it fill my lungs before I breathed it out.
"I didn't realize you had asthma- why didn't you tell me what?" Harry seemed to panic once he saw me.
"I don't- the inhaler just helps me catch my breath when I can't get it myself or when the guys aren't here to help me" I told him.
I was finally better.
I still had a little compression, but I knew as soon as I laid down with one of the boys, it would be better.
"I'm so sorry- I woke you up and then made you drive all the way-" "vanessa- no apologizing" he laughed quickly.
"I was already awake, I'm an early riser and I have to get ready for work soon. And taking you home was a pleasure- I wouldn't want you to be in that kind of pain in my house where no one can comfort you, I'd rather you be home- where you're comfortable" he told me, making me smile .
"Thank you again, for everything" I smiled to him, seeing him smile.
"Anytime, it's seriously no problem at all, I'm sorry you had a bad night and a bad wake up call. Hopefully if we do this again, it'll be better. Now go rest, I'll text the boys and tell them everything, you nap well" he smiled, making me smile back
"Thank you, Harry"
