𝗠𝗨𝗧𝗘 ❪ 𝒋𝒂𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒚 ❫

chapter fifteen

I got the next day and packed my duffle bag up and kissed zach's lips goodbye. Although he stops me in my tracks and turns me around a little, "where are you going baby" zach asked softly.

I swallowed a lump in my throat as I signed that I had to go home before my mom files missing child report. "ok I love you, and I'll see you at school tomorrow" zach says as I nod, truth is I don't know if I could stand another day.

I soon turn back around and start my journey back home, and when I get there it's pitch quiet. im guessing no one was home and thats good because everything is going as planned.

I go upstairs to my bedroom and drop my duffle bag immediately. I glance at myself and take a close look at myself, I hate you.

[normal-- jack's movement]⇣TRIGGERING WARNING⇣  [bold-- the letter jack wrote]

I glanced at the bathroom in my bedroom and walk through the door as I open up my letter leaving it on the bathroom counter. dear zach, I know what you're thinking. you think this is your fault, when its not and you think you could have done something to help me, but you really couldn't have if you think really hard about it.

I start going through the medicine cabinets looking for my depression pills I never once took a day in my life. I want to still thank you for the best year of my life, these few months have been an amazing ride. I thank you for letting me know what love feels like, being my first kiss  and first at everything else. although you don't deserve me, you and me wouldn't work out. you'd deserve someone who can be there for you and give you the absolute world, and you deserve someone you can talk with actual words to. im not that person.

Once I find the pills I accidentally drop them, but bend down to pick them up and I start reading the label making sure not to screw up again. I wasn't even supposed to come into your life, your that attractive guy that had every girl and boy head over heels for you. me I'm just a mute.

I immediately pry open the container since its a little stuck, but I quickly stop just to wipe away my tears and lock the door behind me. I love you zach, I really do because you were everything I dreamed of. someone who can give me slight hope and someone who can love and care about me, but lets be for real right now.. good things aren't meant to last in my life so why wait around for the good things to turn into bad things.

I dump the entire pills out of the bottle into my bare hands and look at them for a little as a tear drops onto the floor. im sorry if I hurt you the process didn't mean to trust me. I would never wanna hurt you, but I hope you understand that I've always been going through a lot mentally and physically and I cant take it anymore. it's tiring because it's everyday, I hate myself zach and I tried to run from my problems by staying at your house for over a month. the problems don't go away they follow.

Sooner or later I digest all of the pills from the bottle and swallow them down with water. I've been already taken the pills by the time you see this, so I'm going to ask you to promise me one thing zachary. just this one thing.

I walk right into the wall holding onto the doorframe feeling a certain way I don't know of, because to be honest I never succeeded and taken this much. I want you to promise you will not be too sad, and if you are it's okay to cry. I don't want you to let anyone tell you that crying is bad because it's not ok love.

I collapse right onto the floor foaming out the mouth as I clutch my stomach, sweat dripping from my head. I also want you to promise me that you are going to take care of yourself and that you are going to find someone to spend your life with in the future, please for me.

I struggle soon enough to keeping my eyes open. thank you, anyways I want keep reading forever. you know I love you, but for just an reminder I love you 3000 zach. 

gracefully my eyes shut and my arm falls as my heart soon enough slows it's pace. love, jack <3

•••

third pov

zach sat in the waiting room focusing on a dot on the floor as his right leg shakes up in down. you can say he was nervous, when he heard the news from his sister sydnie he didn't care if it was 5am in the morning he rushed to the hospital in black and blue striped pajamas and a black tee with some nike air forces on.

he just wanted to know if the love of his life was ok and healthy, and most importantly alive.

sydnie in a few officers comes out the room walking over to zach, "what's wrong.. is he ok... can I see him" zach questions sydnie and the officers behind her all too fast.

Zach's heart was pacing really fast, he glanced at sydnie and looked her in the eyes and recognized the look. its was sadness, "sydnie..." zach says carefully as his eyes fall to what's in one of the officers hand, it's the suicide letter written with Zach's name on it.

"jack seems to want you to have it kid" the officer says handing it to zach before pivoting away.

zach slowly glanced at the other officer as he opens his mouth to zach " sorry for your loss kid" the officer then left guiding a broken sydnie away from the young brown haired boy.

a tear drops from Zach's eyes again as he opens the letter slowly letting his eyes fall down and skim through the letter.

once zach finished he drops the letter and breaks down crying, " nO NO" zach runs to jacks room refusing to believe the love of his life who he dreamed of marrying one day was dead.

he ran into jack's room and saw his baby boy pale and lifeless in his hospital bed, " baby noo" zach cries as he steps forward to the older boy in the bed. zach bends slightly over and pecks jack's chapped soft lips. "I promise baby, for you anything for you my love. I love you 3000 too no matter what"

and just like the zach pivots away and cries as he walks back home, slightly happy because his baby isn't in pain. as long as his baby wasn't in pain he was just as happy.

•••

THE

 END

I'm not crying, it's just allergies istg

anyways didn't know how else to end it, but this ending wasn't planned.

the ending og was supposed to be happy, but yenno it is what it is

am I disappointed of this book, yes

are we surprised, no

anyways goodnight <3