craquaria ✰ i love you, or whatever

Chapter 4: Word Vomit

Miz Cracker/Maxwell's POV

The alarm went off and without even opening my eyes I turned it off, shrieking and forcing myself to stretch out of the bed. It was a new day and that meant I had a new opportunity to make a good impression on everyone, especially the judges. I got out of bed and went directly into the bathroom. I took a quick shower, washed my face and brushed my teeth.

By the time I was done getting dressed I heard a knock on my door. I looked at the alarm clock. I had set my alarm two hours before stipulated so that I'd be ready in time, and only half an hour had passed, why would production come to knock on my door this early? I started getting nervous, what if I had done something wrong? What if they were going to kick me out? This made no sense. I cleared my throat and walked as confidently as I could towards the door, feeling my knees shake. I blinked strongly, held my breath and opened the door. And to my surprise, there were no producers or cameramen standing there.
It was Giovanni. I stood there, frozen, confused and scared shitless of what was he going to say. I stared at him for some more time, confused, with the eyes wide open, creating the worst scenarios in my head without even realizing that time was passing.

- "Umm hi. I.. Umm... I saw the light from your room coming out from under the door and I thought It'd be a good moment to just say hey and clear the air up. - Giovanni said, starting to get red and smiling awkwardly.
- "Oh, umm, hey. Uhh, yeah sure. - I answered, while I just blankly kept staring at him. Time passed.
- "So... Are you like, going to let me in or what...? - Giovanni said. 
- "Oh my goodness. Yeah, sure... I.. Of course, come in, come in. I'm sorry I was just, ummm, surprised. Wasn't really expecting you, to be quite honest."
- "Who were you expecting then?" - He said with a smirk and a very particular look in his eyes.
- "I wasn't exactly expecting anyone. I just thought you might be someone from the production crew or something. How did you even know which room I was in?" - I asked with a frowned forehead.
- "Duh... I have eyes, you dummy. I saw you getting into your room las night. - He told with a playful tone and a nervous smile. Then his entire facial expression changed. He walked up to the other side of the room and stared at the window for a bit, while I just looked at him and sat on the bed. I knew he hadn't just come here to announce the fact that we were room neighbors. He's more clever than that. He turned around and determinedly looked at me.

- I'm here because I needed to talk with you... about what I said yesterday. Or well... what The Vixen said I said. I wanted to apologize. It wasn't cool from me to allow the whole New York drama to follow us here and I should've stopped the gossip when I had the chance. I.. I just.. I'm sorry. I really am. I didn't really think that you being here would end up affecting me this much or like whatever. I just, I mean...when I saw you after my entrance I just acted as if I didn't care. I didn't want to care! Because I mean, well, you know... I thought it'd be a distraction but then as everything progressed, I just... I got angry at you, Max. -
Giovanni said kinda shouting and looking at me. His shallow mask seemed to start peeling off and I started seeing and overly emotional Giovanni. One I had never seen before. I felt my hands begin to sweat. God, I was so nervous, why would she say all of this now? Why would he get angry at me? I had to look up because I felt my eyes watering and my face turning red. I shook my head, kept listening and staring at her while he made his biggest efforts not to stutter over his own words.
- I mean, I was angry with myself but I focused it all on you! I've missed you so much and ever since we stopped hanging out or whatsoever I've had this anger build up inside of me, I can feel it all the time, mostly whenever someone brings you up or says your name. I've tried concealing this sad feeling with all of my strength and it ended up turning into anger and negativity or, like, I don't know just, you know, bad stuff and shit. I just wanted to say I'm sorry okay? I'm truly sorry, for everything I've said and done. I- I'm... I'm gonna go now. I'm sorry, I think I shouldn't have come here to your room in the first place. I- I'm. Yeah, I'm leaving. Sorry, I can't do this right now.-

Giovanni reached out to the door, trying to escape the huge word vomit he had just spilled all over my bedroom. I don't know what he was exactly planning to say when he came in here, but I know it wasn't that. I know him too well, he's not this open about his feelings. He never apologizes first, God... He never fucking apologizes period. I don't think he's ever been this open about his feelings and regret with anyone, EVER. I was shaking and felt all tangled up with my emotions and thoughts that I almost didn't catch him in time before he went out the door.

- "Hey, don't, please wait." - I exclaimed.
- "Yeah?" - He said while he turned back with a sad face and glowing eyes.
- "I have some things to say too... Please don't go, not yet."- I told him.

Gio came back into the room and shut the door behind him. I had so many things to say but at that moment my mind went blank... I was just going to have to speak my mind. Some time went by and I was just there. Standing. Looking at him and the floor. With nothing other than a concerned expression in my face. I hadn't thought of what I was going to say. I just didn't want him to go. I still hadn't processed all of what he had said but I was gonna have to improvise something. I had to respond, a lot of time had passed since the last time we were able to hang out happily without any drama. I wanted him back, I needed him back. I lifted my face from staring at the floor so much, stood up straight, swallowed hard and started talking. I had to get this out of my chest.

- " Giovanni... I..."

*******************************
Lsjdksjdkskksjdlsjfldjdksjsks GIRL THE TENSION IS JUST 😳😳😳