1981 » The Marauders Era

eleven ; dear dumbledore

Dear Professor Dumbledore,

It's been a slow and painful ride, hasn't it? I suppose we, the ones of us who have been left behind, should have prepared for it.

This world is cruel and unfair, and was so undeserving of them. All of them. James, Lily, Marlene, Regulus, Dorcas, Mary, Edgar, Benjy, Fabien, Gideon. Some days I sit there repeating their names over and over like a lullaby. In a peculiar way, it's become a soothing regularity for me; I have nothing left. Even Sirius is gone, and I know I'll never see him again, that's the most painful part about it. The fact that he's still out there somewhere, suffering for something he didn't do, and I can't help him. I can't help any of them.

Over the past months, I've reflected on death a lot. And I've realised it's only when you start to fear death, that you learn to appreciate life. Looking back on it, our lives were pretty fucking great. We lived more in those ten years then most do in a lifetime. And all I hope for now, knowing that the dark lord has vanished, is that Harry gets to experience the life that we had at Hogwarts. That's all I hope for in this cruel and unfair world.

It's hard to think about the future when we have so much pain in our past. But I believe that our futures will be bright. And the futures of all generations will be peaceful and kind to them, the youth deserve the most time of us all.

Thinking back, if I could just forget about all the suffering and torture, I feel proud of what we did. We defeated the Dark Lord together. Not many can say that, can they?

On behalf of my friends, I want to thank you for everything you did for us, Professor, and for everything you continue to do for all. And we forgive you for your mistakes. Mistakes are what make us human. Though, some are more forgivable than others.

Lest we never forget the massacre of October 31st 1981.

If there's one thing I learnt from the wizarding war, it's that I can die in any way that fate chooses- that's not up to me. But what is within my power is to decide how I live. Courageously or timidly.

From R.J Lupin