❝I can use my hands for more than just typing, boss.❞
❝Your desk is crowded, like my pants. Why don't you get rid of them both, mmm?❞
Kim Namjoon, the wealthiest man in Seoul, owns one of the richest businesses in Korea. Kim Seokjin is a stripper t...
Namjoon focused less on him because of his job, so he lost a lot of communication with the young man. However, not all contact was lost.
He still gets to see him daily, and keep track of how he's doing, since he still works for him as a secretary. And to top it off, he also recently moved in with him.
Seokjin figured that by staying in the same home Hyunseok and him practically grew up in, didn't do him any good. He wasn't trying to eliminate the memories of his brother, but rather avoid them to try and move on.
That still didn't stop him from taking his photos of him, and the rest of his belongings, which he stored away in various boxes to keep them safe. Each item he found, the man grew saddened with just seeing Hyunseok's things, that reminded him of his brother.
He still remembered the way he used to use some specific items, like his cologne, his neckties, sunglasses, wrist watches.
It was tough for Seokjin to handle the items, with the memories filling up in his head. But he stayed strong and carried Hyunseok's personal belongings to store them in a room.
His heart still ached, terribly. After recovering from his brother's death and funeral, Seokjin grew closer to his parents at the burial. Seeing the adults that raised both him and his brother, reunited at Hyunseok's funeral, made Seokjin realize how much he truly missed them.
Now, he needed the support more than ever. And with Namjoon by his side, Seokjin's days slowly brightened, as his heart started to heal from the tragic event that occurred the day he fell down the stairs.
Sometimes he blames himself for his brother's death.
"If I wouldn't have fallen down the stairs and wouldn't have gotten injured, maybe I could have stopped you from leaving..." His thoughts didn't make him feel any better.
They just devastated the man furthermore, which is why Namjoon doesn't allow him to stay on his own, to not run the risk of Seokjin attempting anything he might regret, or getting injured on accident.
His friend usually stays with Seokjin, to keep him company while Namjoon is at work.
"I'm sorry for keeping you here with me, Daejung." Seokjin smiled with sadness radiating from his expressions.
"Don't apologize. I enjoy your company very much, Seokjin. Oh! And by the way... I finished the pictures you were talking about." Daejung humbly spoke with kindness to the older man.
"Show me." The younger approached Seokjin with a laptop. A warm smile appeared on the other's face when he saw a picture of him with Hyunseok.
"We took these Polaroid pictures two years ago, at a... a Party. Sorry." Seokjin stopped talking to prevent any tears from streaming down his face.
He's cried for so long, and asks himself how there are still tears left in him, after five months of crying over Hyunseok.
Hyunseok left a huge punctured wound within Seokjin's chest, ever since his departure from this world. After joking almost all of his life with his brother over who was going to take care of who whenever they grew old and wrinkly, Hyunseok's death made Seokjin realize that he won't get to grow old with his twin.
That he won't be able to physically interact with him, or show him his future children. If and when he decides to adopt ones, or get married with a woman and have kids of his own.
Seokjin is still uncertain of his own future, and if he'll even have half of the people he knows now I'm his life. That includes Namjoon and his relationship with him.
After all, he never imagined Hyunseok dying at such a young age, and in such a tragic way. So he wasn't going to get his hopes up in lasting with someone forever, and pushed a few of his peers away.
His fear of losing others increased, to a point of him no longer wanting to socialize and gather around with the rest of the people. Namjoon tried to encourage him in leaving the house and getting some fresh air, or perhaps socializing with some of his old friends, but the mere thought of leaving the house to meet others made Seokjin feel sick to his stomach.
Not because he hates people, but because he doesn't want to lose them. No matter who he meets in life, no one compares to his twin.
He wishes nothing more than to see Hyunseok once more, but now he has to wait until the day he himself dies, to meet him again and hold onto him like never before. Sure, the thought of dying scared Seokjin, but he wasn't planning on doing anything to himself to purposely die.
He knows that suicide won't bring him closer to Hyunseok any sooner, and that he'll worsen the situation by leaving his parents, Namjoon, and others to mourn his death as well. One death was enough, there wasn't room for another tragedy to happen this year.
If he had to wait more than 50 years to die, then he was willing to wait. But just because the man is living, doesn't mean he feels alive inside.
On the outside he appears perfectly fine, but on the inside, he's a broken boy who misses his old life, and wishes he could change his past mistakes, so they could stop eating him alive.
Unfortunately, life doesn't have a time machine, and he can't save his brother from dying. So, Seokjin lives on with those cruel thoughts in his head, adjusting to the way his new life is now.
"Seokjin, are you okay?" Daejung asked for the third time, waving his hand in front of Seokjin's eyes. The older hasn't blinked once, since he was so lost in thought.
When he channeled back into reality, a tear descended from his left eye. The man wiped it away and finally spoke to Daejung.
"I'm okay. Where... Where are the pictures." Seokjin softly asked, forgetting about having seen the pictures a while ago.
"They're uh... On your lap, Seokjin." Daejung pointed at Seokjin's crotch. Seokjin held the one picture in his hand, smiling at it.
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"His specialties: Winking and making me smile. You're irreplaceable, Hyunseok."
