Denial and Acceptance

Chapter 16

"We're home," I yelled as I opened the door"Hey, Otabek, Yuri... did you get to see him?" Yuuri asked"No...we couldn't see him," Yuri said annoyed"As I thought, I knew I'd be a waste of time," Victor exclaimed"Vitya.. don't say that, what did we talk about earlier." Yuuri surprised"Yea, Yea, Yea, I know, I'm too insensitive, but I really don't get why you'd go if you most likely won't be able to see them. Can't I be curious?" Victor asked"Vitya-" Yuuri started only for Yuri to interrupt him"Forget it Katsudon, that's just how he is, the sooner you accept that, the better your marriage will be in the future..." Yuri groveled as he walked upstairs"Wait! Yuri-" Yuuri started till I heard the door upstairs closed, Yuuri turned to me, "Did.. something happen?""... We overheard the doctors talking, they weren't sure if he'd live through the night..." I replied"Oh.. I see..""Hey... Yuuri... I wanted to talk to you about something.""Yeah sure, what is it.." Yuuri asked"I attempted to tell Yuri... That... I.." I stampered until Yuuri interrupted me with a knowing tone"Really? What did he say?""...He thinks I have a crush on some random guy.." I said solemnly"What? but you said you like him right.." Yuuri asked confused"...I said I had a crush on someone... I wasn't very clear..""Then you should clarify. Not now, obviously. But you can't just leave it open-ended.." Victor chimed in"...I tried, but... I was so nervous I switched to my native language...""What did you say?" Yuuri Asked"Мен сені жақсы көремін.. That's Kazakh for... I love you...He was patient and tried to ask me to repeat, but I panicked and ran off... he must have followed me cause that's...that's when we heard the doctors..""It's ok, first love is scary.." Yuuri cut me off"But..if I had just calmed down and repeated myself we wouldn't have heard them talking..""Yea? But who's to say they weren't gonna go looking for you to tell you guys.. or what if his Dedushka does pass tonight... It would be a complete shock at least now he can mentally prepare his self for lousy news... All we can do now is hope he pulls through, what did Yuri say about your crush? Does he at least know you like a guy?""... He was somewhat understanding... He assumed I was afraid to tell him because of how treats your guys' relationship...""That's good... At least we know he isn't homophobic..""I never thought he was... remember he stood up for you guys last week...""I suppose you're right.. Now Otabek I'm here for you but.. right now.. you should go be there for Yuri. I can't imagine the pain he feels right now..""You're right.. I should go Comfort him... that is if he wants me to.."*******"Vitya... I told you, I understand you weren't trying to be mean, but you can't just ask things like that. If you really want to understand you can just wait till he leaves and ask me.""Why should I take your word for it, you aren't him. you can't be claiming you know exactly how he feels right?""Well, no... but questions like that are accusatory... imagine how he feels being questioned why he'd want to see his only family.""I guess your right but.. still, I should be allowed to ask him questions..""Then.. at least wait.. you can't be too hasty with these things.."********As if it had become apart of my daily routine I once again walked up to Yura's room and knocked"Beka how many times do I have to tell you, you don't need to knock. Come in.""How did you know it was me?" I asked as I opened the door."Victor wouldn't knock, and Yuuri waits an hour typically before coming up.""Oh.. I see... Yura are you-""Alright. Yea I guess, eh. It's whatever..""Yura... That's not true. You can't just ignore it.""Really? watch me then..""Yura that's not healthy.""Alright, Katsudon..""Hey, I'm not Yuuri!""You sound like him though, look I just want to go to bed it's late.""Ok Yura, goodnight."*********I looked at the snoring Japanese man beside me. He's asleep, time for my nightly drink. I got up and shuffled out the room towards the kitchen, and as I did I noticed a sniffling sound"Yuri, is that you?" I asked as I switched on the light in the kitchen. When the light turned on, I saw the blond teen sitting before me at the table."What on earth are you doing up at this hour, Old Man.""I could ask the same, you know. why are you crying, in the kitchen of all places?""I didn't want beka to hear me... then he'd know I lied to him earlier.""Why would you lie to him, Yuri? he cares about you.""That's exactly why... I don't want him to worry too much.""Yuri, you can't just lie to people who care about you. Beka worries cause he wants to be there for you." I say as I pour myself a shot of vodka."Yea, yea, I bet you don't even tell Yuuri about your nightly drink.""That's different, this isn't gonna affect anyone long term.""Whatever you tell yourself.," Yuri said giving me a smug look"Hey don't look at me like that I'm the one lecturing you!" I said drink the glass in one gulp, "Why you bring up the vodka anyway, do you want a second taste." I asked pouring two shots"You should really stop offering alcohol to a minor." Yuri said with mild disgust, "Besides that stuff tasted awful.""Vodka is an acquired taste, I don't blame you for not liking it your first go," I state downing another gulp"Hey if you drink too much I'll tell Yuuri, I'm not gonna babysit you if you get drunk.""Eh whatever, fine I'll go to bed, do what you want with the remaining shot."