Denial and Acceptance

We need to talk (Chapter 31)

"Hey... Yuri.." I said as the door creaked open, as the light from the hall reached his face, it became clear he was fast asleep. I guess I'll have to wait till tomorrow to talk to him. I thought to myself as I closed the door quietly and began heading downstairs. When I made it to the bottom of the stairs, I saw Yuuri on the floor setting up a mattress like thing.

"Hey, Yuuri, what are you doing?"

"Oh, I had my sister send a futon to us when I saw you sleeping down here the first time, Had a feeling it wouldn't be the last time... it should be more comfortable than the couch.."

"Thanks.."

"Did you talk to him?"

"He was asleep. I decided it was best not to wake him up."

"You're probably right."

"Yuuri. Am I a fool.. to still think I have a chance..."

"You're not a fool, you're a person with feelings; however... you shouldn't waste your feelings on someone who's not returning them.. you'll only get hurt in the end.. you know that, right?"

"Yea.. but I can't help but.. nevermind... I'm going to sleep.."

"Night Otabek," Yuuri said, returning to his and Victor's room.

"Meow.," Potya whined, sniffing the futon.

"Hey... Potya.. how you doing?" I said, kneeling doing to pet the curious cat before laying on my futon.

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Ughh... My head... What happened yesterday again? I thought to myself as I pulled down the sheet, immediately my eyes were Assaulted by light.

"Otabekk! You forgot the curtains," I cried, yanking the covers back up.

No reply? was he asleep? I extended my arm in his direction, trying to find him to wake him up, but all I found was cold empty space.

Where is he? I pondered, then I remembered, I upset him yesterday, he's not in the room, of course, he isn't. Why am I so dumb? at that moment I heard a pounding on the door

"What!" I exclaimed grumpily sitting up immediately shutting my eyes as once again I was blinded

"Yuri? Are you up?" the voice of the other side.

Otabek.

"Yea, yea... I'm up..." I replied, I heard the door squeak open, I cringed at the sound

"Ow... that sound.."

"Sorry... Yuri... I want to talk about last night... but first... are you gonna look at me?" He asked clearly puzzled by the fact I was looking around with closed eyes

"Yea.. but it's so bright..." I whimpered

"Yuri. Are you hungover?" Otabek asked I could tell by his tone he wasn't too pleased

'Yea, So what?" I said, words seeming to just slip out my mouth. Moments later, I heard the curtains slide closed. I blinked my eyes open, as I searched for Beka in the room, I almost had motion blur. Soon my eyes fixated on Otabeks figure by the curtains.

"Listen, Yuri... I know you say things you don't mean when you're angry, but that doesn't change what you said was hurtful. You know that?"

I simply nodded, I didn't have the words to say to him.

"not gonna say anything, huh? Whatever, Look ok. I'm sorry if it feels like I overreacted or anything... Maybe I should know by now to take everything you say with a grain of salt. So I'll forgive you, but Please... Try to work on thinking before you speak, ok?"

"..Ok.." I replied it felt like I had to force the sound out

"Alright... Now then... I'm gonna go."

"Yea.," I replied, my fists clenched under the covers,

Why was he the one apologizing? I was clearly wrong! I don't deserve forgiveness. Come on! Yell at me, tell me how much I hurt you! Demand an Apology! Something! The door closed behind him, and I felt the tears roll down my cheeks. He was just here?! Why didn't I apologize! Why am I like this! Whatever. It's doesn't matter. Tomorrow on, we are going to try harder? Right?