It's All In Your Head {Sequel to STCG}

Chapter 14 - The Tape

I woke up the next morning, buzzing with worry and excitement and curiosity. What was on that tape? Was it important?

Sadly, it was school again. Mum had been fuming when I told her I had a three hour detention yesterday for what I did, but seeing as I was in a difficult situation, she didn't spend too long giving me a telling off and a lecture.

Slowly, I trudged downstairs with my uniform on and my hair brushed, and went straight to the kitchen. I was never hungry in the mornings, and after the school trip, I was less so. Usually I'd just nibble on a piece of fruit or toast and then tell Mum I was finished – she let me off all the time.

"Mum, I'm ready," I said after having a few bites of apple.

"Okay, wait by the car and I'll be out in a sec," she replied. I did as she told and went to wait by the car. It was a chilly morning, and there was a frost on the windscreen, but Mum would probably wipe that off soon. Eventually she came out with a piece of cloth. I knew it!

"Let me just clean off the frost quickly."

"Take all the time you need," I muttered, wanting to waste all possible time to not be in that hell hole.

"Wouldn't want you to be late," she said cheerily.

"I want to be late!"

"Why?"

"I hate it there!"

"When you make friends you'll enjoy it more."

"No I won't! Are you this ignorant? All the girls there are sluts, with short skirts and fags coming from their mouths."

"Emma!"

"No, I don't want to go. I don't fit in at all and I never will."

"There must be one good girl there?" She asked uncertainly.

"Nope, not one."

There was a long silence as she scrubbed off the frost, more aggressively this time. I tapped my foot impatiently, feeling fed up again. Why won't she understand?

"If you want to waste your fucking life in your room, being pathetic and non-social, then so be it. When you're older, you can regret it as much as you like because I won't care. Sure, 'Leather Face' has affected you but hasn't it worn off yet?!"

I stood still in shock, my jaw dropping. I'd never heard Mum swear, atleast in front of me, and she never made fun of me for being depressed about Leather Face. Why now? Why now, when I needed her most?

"Emma, I'm sorry." She sighed, rubbing her temples slowly. "I've been so stressed recently."

"Yeah, 'cause of me," I replied sadly. My head hung slightly, afraid of my eyes meeting hers and things being awkward.

"No, not because of you. Because of what happened to you. I worry so much, and sometimes you... You seem to take advantage of that."

"Mum, I'm sorry-"

"Ok, ok, I understand. You can have this one day off. I know how difficult it must be; you just came back from a school trip and yet I expect you to start a new school? It's going to be hard, so I'm allowing you to have this one day to relax and get your mind round things. But tomorrow, you're going back – no questions asked. Y'hear me?"

I nodded mournfully. Despite the fact I wanted to stay at home, when I actually got my way it made me feel... Guilty? Embarrassed? ... Or maybe even both?