Recently Adjacent

RA 6: Settle Down Already, Won't Cha.

I woke up to the smell of hot Doritos breath, which was apparently my own.

I was asleep on my back which, naturally, made it hurt so bad right now.

I tried to lift up many times but failed, many times.

Oh don't get worried now. It's because of my...passing out. Not because I'm getting old.

<[RA= Recently Adjacent not Rheumatoid Arthritis, now!]>

I will curse that day and all the others after it when that day comes.

I grabbed hold of the couch armrest and pulled myself up with a loud Crack! noise following it.

Ma back!

I wasn't too focused on the crack for long because when I stood up and really opened my eyes, I was shocked.

Xavier was knocked out on the coffee table, drool coming out of his mouth, and on the floor next to the table is Robin-McKenzie and Mason-Abel.

Oh my gosh. Is my family dead?

With precaution, I take out a safety pin from my long sleeved shirt and begin poking.

That wakes the sons of guns up.

Woo-hoo!

"What the hell, dad?!" Robin flinches and gets up immediately after I stick her.

"Watch your f-ing language, Robin!"

"Watch your effing language, X!"

Mason still isn't up yet which convinced me that, "He Dead."

Well, I tried.

Robin snatches the safety pin from my hands and says, "I'll handle it," not before sticking me in the butt with it first.

That's fair.

Once Mason is up, he decides to stab...the couch?

"Ouch," I hear the couch say.

Couch? You can talk?

Oh. Nevermind. It's all coming together now.

Turns out he actually stabbed Andrea.

She stood up immediately and my eyes soared over to her.

I'm not going to tell you how I feel right now, because that's a surprise for later.

I stare some more in awkward silence for a good maybe 10 seconds before I excuse myself to the bathroom.

I felt like I was going to pee on myself.

That wasn't because of the age, but because I had a lot of...pineapple juice yesterday. That's it.

Narration:

After Henry left the room WITHOUT asking to be excused, he made his lil old way to the only bathroom Millie's house possessed.