The Missing Gem

19 | Backfire

Nicole

I was not prepared for this. Because firstly, I had no idea this was the person Lucas would be meeting with, and secondly, because even if I had spend the last days thinking of what to say when I saw Matt, I would probably still not know what words would come out of my mouth at this very moment. 

I saw his figure from behind. It was undoubtedly him, the guy who broke my heart.

Lucas parked my car not too far away and we were now walking to meet Matthew, side by side.

"Good evening, sir." Lucas said with his gentle voice that I adored. 

When Matthew turned around in his heels and his eyes landed on me, I knew he was caught up in a surprise. 

"Nicole..."

"Hi." I said flatly, emotionless. 

"I didn't expect to see you here."

"I didn't expect to see you either." Inside I was shaking, but I knew on the outside I was making him question even wanting to buy the ring that I wanted to just stomp on and make it just disappear once and for all.

"Well, um... this is awkward." 

Of course it was. It all made sense - at least, some sense - to me now. Lucas said the buyer - Matt - wanted to buy the ring and try to get the girl he lost - me - back. Which also explained why he'd been trying to reach out to me with calls, texts and e-mails that I deliberately ignored. No wonder he thought this was awkward. 

"Yeah, tell me about it." When he didn't say anything else, I continued. "You must be happy, that you found the ring." 

"Nic, it's not-"

"Nicole." I corrected him. Only Lucas could call me Nic, Matt had lost his Nic rights.

"Nicole." He said, his hands made their way up in defense.

"Save it. Look, you wanted that ring and you're gonna get it now. It was your money on the line, I get it. Just don't come and tell me you loved me because that is not true." I was sounding way harsher than I had initially intended, and I had to take a deep breath to cool myself down.

"I want to talk to you, if you're okay with it."

"Shoot."

"This will be a lot more awkward with him here, but... I want you to reconsider us, Nicole. Let's just put what happened behind us, let's focus on ourselves and where we can go from here. I know I made a lot of mistakes, and I know I probably deserved to hear a lot of the things that you said to me but, you have to believe that I've changed."

"I appreciate you trying to change, I really do. And if anything, I hope that it helps you with your future relationships. But I can't ever let you back in again, I just can't." My voice tried to betray me but I didn't took the bait, and carried on talking with the best vocal consistency that I could muster. "You hurt me a lot-"

"I know I did." He cut me off this time.

"You hurt me a lot, and I could, I can forgive you. But I found love in the process of getting hurt and getting over you. There is no easy way to say this, but Lucas is the person I love. He's taught me how to love and how to feel loved. I found a very good man who makes me happy, and I'm not letting him go, ever. And specially not for you."

"Ouch."

"I'm sorry if this came out too harsh, I really didn't mean to. All I'm trying to say is, you're wasting your time trying to get me back. You won't get me back, it's over for us. But if it helps in any way, or if this makes you feel any better, I do believe that you've changed. I've always trusted you, that's not gonna change now, and if you say you've changed it's because you have. And I am really happy for you, and proud of you for acknowledging your mistakes, owning up to them and making a change. One day you're gonna find a girl who's gonna be everything that you look for and she's gonna be nothing like me, and that's when you're going to fully understand the meaning behind all I'm saying right now."