You Had Me At Hello

8: My Hopes Are So High That Your Kiss Might Kill Me

A few days had passed since our late night picnic-turned-sleepover. Things seemed relatively normal. He hadn't pressed the situation any further. Mikey, on the other hand, grew more anxious with each passing day. Today, that anxiety came to a peak. We were sitting on the steps in front of my house, enjoying one of the last few warm days of the year.

"So, have you thought about what you are gonna tell him?" He inquired. I looked down at the ground between my feet.

"I've thought about it," I responded. I could feel him staring at me. I knew he wanted me to tell him what it was that I was going to say. I knew he wanted a definitive answer so that he could begin to make a plan. I knew that, more than anything, he just wanted to hear that everything was going to be okay.

"Well, have you decided?"

"No," I replied honestly. "I'm still torn. On one hand, we really already do all of the couple type things. On the other hand, I just don't think that I'm ready for that level of commitment. We've really only been hanging out for about a month and a half." He was quiet for a few minutes. He took a deep breath.

"I understand," he sighed. "Well, who knows? Maybe he won't be too upset about it. He does know that it has been such a short time."

"Yeah, maybe..." I took out a cigarette and lit it. We sat in silence as I smoked.

"So, when are you going to tell him?" He asked quietly.

"I guess sooner is better than later," I sighed. He nodded as he stood up.

"Well, want to go hang out at the house before the awkward sets it?" I nodded and stood up. "Well, my parents are going on a date tonight, so it'll just be the three of us."

"Isn't it always?" I laughed. He just shrugged, and we headed towards their house. When we arrived, we went inside and headed for his room. Mikey went in, but I stopped at the door and looked down the hall. He turned to look at me.

"You gonna go check on him?" I nodded and continued down the hall to Gerard's room. I knocked on the door, but there was no answer. I pushed the door open, revealing nothing but a dark room. As I closed the door, I heard the sound of water running from the bathroom. I came to the door and knocked.

"Gee?" I asked through the door. There was no reply. I pushed the door open. "Gerard?" Still, nothing. The longer I didn't get a response, the more panicked I got. I stepped into the bathroom and call his name again. He didn't answer. My heart began racing as I approached the shower. Tears burned behind my eyes as I tried to prepare for the worst. I reached out and grabbed the edge of the curtain. I took a deep breath and pulled it back.

"What the fuck?!" I caught myself staring at him for a second before averting my eyes. He slung the curtain shut.

"I'm...I'm sorry," I stammered. I backed out of the bathroom and shut the door. I leaned up against the wall, feeling my face burn. I tried to get my embarrassment under control, but the door opened, and he stepped out, wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. He raised a brow at me in amusement.

"You know, if you wanted to see me naked, you could've just asked," he said with a smirk. The flames burned hotter on my face. I just turned and walked quickly back to Mikey's room. I shut the door behind me, and Mikey looked up at me with confusion.

"What happened?"

"Ah, nothing. He was in the shower." And I just saw your brother totally naked.

"Oh, okay. Well, do you want to watch a movie? Maybe order some pizza?" I nodded.

"Yeah, that sounds good," I agreed. There was a knock on his door. I stepped away from it as it opened.

"Hey, Gee. We're gonna order a pizza and watch a movie. You in?" I stared a hole into the floor, not wanting to make eye contact.

"Sounds good to me." I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Okay," Mikey said as he stood up. "You guys go find a movie while I order." I managed to maneuver around Gerard without looking up.

"Cool. I'm gonna go smoke first." I heard Mikey groan in mild annoyance.

"You and your bad habit, I swear to God." I rolled my eyes and slipped out the front door. Before I could pull it shut, Gerard grabbed it and followed me out. I stepped to the side and reached for my cigarettes. I pulled one out and lit it.

"So," he said after a few seconds of awkward silence. I kept my eyes on the ground. "What happened in there? I'm not used to people just walking in on me while I'm in the shower."

"Well, I went to tell you that we were back, and you weren't in your room. Then, I heard the shower running, and I went to make sure that you were okay, but you didn't answer any of the times that I said your name." I took a drag and blew it out. "I was worried that something might have happened to you." I felt warmth on my face as he caressed it. I finally looked up at him.

"Aw, you were worried about me?" I nodded. He smiled softly. "Well, it's been almost two weeks." My heart sank. I didn't want to have this conversation yet. I didn't want to ruin the day before it started. "Have you thought about what I said?" Every damn day. I sighed as I pulled away.

"Yes, I have." He just nodded understanding. Before I could say anything else, he put his hand up.

"It's okay. Can I do something, before you tell me your decision?" I tilted my head to the side. He put his hands on my face and leaned in close. He gently brushed his lips against mine. My stomach erupted in butterflies. He leaned back and smiled. "Just in case your answer was no. If you don't mind, despite how anxiously I've awaited your answer, I would rather wait until later on to hear the verdict."

"Oh, okay," I said quietly. My heart fluttered as the warmth of his lips lingered on my own. "We should probably get back in there then." He nodded in agreement and opened the door for me.

"After you, sugar." I stepped inside and we made our way to the living room. Tonight. We will talk about it tonight.