Be My Kryptonite.

Where Do We Go From Here?

Nicole's POV 

"Nicole?" He stood there, "please, talk to me. You can't do this." He tried to hug me again. I pushed him off. I didn't say anything. "So this is it?" He sat down, "It's over. It's just going to end with a letter" a tear fell down his cheek "you're not even going to let me hug you or at least say what I want or say my goodbye. You're just going to run away and shut me out." He now held his head in his hands and grew silent. I didn't know what to say. We sat there a few moments. He looked up at me, his eyes were red and puffy. He looked devastated. Tears were rolling down his face, "Fine" he stood up. I couldn't do this anymore. Seeing him stand up and about to leave, it was then that it hit me. "Wait" I sniffled and stood up. "Why should I? You can't even look at me. I just thought we had something stronger but I guess I was wrong. So fine. You got your wish. Happy now?" He whipped his eyes. "No. I'm not." I started crying again, "I thought this would all be easier by writing it in a letter. But it's not. It will never be easy, saying goodbye and having to leave the ones you love and care for the most." I walked over to him. "I don't know what to say or do. That's why I left." He lifted his hand and whipped away my tears with his thumb. "That's fine. I don't know what to say or do either. But we will figure it out. We can get through this, we can get through anything" he pulled me into a hug. "I made a promise to you. I promised that I would be there for you, always. And I'm going to be, whether you like it or not. We're going to figure it out, I'm not letting you go." He kissed my head. He pulled away from the hug and looked into my eyes. 

"It's not that simple Harry" I stared right into his eyes "it was always so easy. You know to just be able to say what I needed and run away? I would be sad at first but I got over it eventually. I moved on, forgot about it." a tear fell off my cheek. "No one ever came after me, I never had to deal with this before so I don't know what to do because I did this not only for me but for you. I felt as if I was bringing you down or was going to. Your famous, you don't have time for my stupid problems and insecurities." I was still staring into his eyes "that's why I'm so confused right now of what to do. I love you more than anything, you are all I ever wanted or needed but I just don't know anymore."

He was staring right back into my eyes, "this is the first time in a while I feel like you are not lying to  protect me. You're finally opening up about your problem and I'm glad because we can now sit down and talk about it and work things out." He took my hand "and I only came after you because I do love you. You told me if I really loved you then I wouldn't come after you but that's the thing Nicole, I do love you but so much more then you think and I couldn't let you get away. Not that easily." He spoke slow and quietly. "I love you Nicole and to be honest it scares me that I love and care for someone so much."

I didn't have anything to say. He pulled me to the bed and sat down, "so, why don't we talk about where it all went wrong and work through this?" I looked down, ashamed. I was disappointed in myself more then anything, I let him down, I broke our promise. "Okay. Well to be honest, those first three weeks were horrible. I was getting so much hate messages and everything was just going wrong. I barely got to talk to you and I had no one to talk about it with." I looked into his eyes "and  I felt like I was slowly losing myself and you. When Rob and I had to leave each other, when he went off to college, that's when it all started to fall apart. And that's what I thought was happening. Everything was triggering me, I was miserable and I didn't want to tell you and make you worried." His eyes were watery and filled with sadness. "Nicole, don't ever think you can't talk to me because you think it'll affect me. And what we have is real, it will never just end like that, with us just slowly drifting apart." He pulled me in for a kiss. I knew what I was doing was somewhat wrong and not good for me but it felt so right. I couldn't just move on and forget about him like everyone else in my life. He meant so much more to me and was such a huge part of my life now, that I don't know what I was thinking. I want to be with him, I want to spend the rest of my life with him, I just don't know how to do that without loosing myself or letting him down.  I loved him so much. 

"We still need to figure out what were going to do." I said quietly.  "I know. My offer still stands, you can come back with me and stay. We can have someone take care of things here." He pulled me on to his lap. "I don't care what we do just as long as you're mine." He hugged me tight. "You're going to miss your show tonight, I feel bad, you have to let down your fans because I let you down." 

"No. You didn't let me down. You were confused and upset and you acted without thinking. The boys were going to figure something out so I don't miss that concert." He took out his phone "let me call them actually and let them know what's going on. They were worried." He dialed a number and held the phone up to his ear. 

'Hey' .... 'Yeah, I'm with her now. She might come back with me. We don't know yet.' .... 'Okay. That's great. What time do I need to be at the airport?' .... 'Okay. Let me get going then. Bye.' 

"What they say?" I asked. "Well, because of the time difference, if I catch the flight that leaves in a little less then an hour, I'll make it back right in time for the concert, they moved it back an hour." He put his hands on my face and looked into my eyes, "Do you want to come? And then after the show or tomorrow we can figure out what's going to happen with us and everything? I don't want to lose you again and you coming with me is the only way I can assure that." I shook my head, "Yeah." He smiled and gave me a kiss. "Let's get going then. We can't miss it." I grabbed my bag I just brought back. We walked out to the living room and explained it to Ava. She was leaving in two days to meet up with them. "Okay, be careful. See you soon. Bye." We walked out and got in the car. 

~~

We were on the plane. We had a couple of hours to work things out and figure out what's going to happen with us. The plane took off, we held hands and I dozed off. 

Harry's POV 

We were on the plane, she had fallen asleep a little while ago. I was happy to have her back with me. I feel terrible knowing she thought she couldn't talk to me about what she was going through. But I'm glad we talked about it. 

It really does scare me, how much I love her. I'm scared though. I'm scared that when we talk about what's going to happen with us, she will want to leave, knowing she'll have to be doing this a lot (being apart for long periods of time). Will we be able to continue what we have? If not, how am I ever supposed to get over her, us, what we had. I won't, I could never and hearing those words she said to me in the letter.. they're stuck in my head;

I don’t want to be doing this but it’s for the best. I will never forget you, I promise. When I’m older, I’ll look back at this wonderful time of my life and I’ll remember your sparkling green eyes and brown curly locks. The way you smiled and laughed. The jokes you told me and all of the amazing times we shared. Hopefully, you’ll miss me and look back on it too.

Those words scared me. When I'm older and look back on this, I want to be able to be sitting next to her, telling our children how perfect we are for each other and how much I loved her then and how much more I love her now. I don't want to even think about sitting there alone, looking back at what we had and how I let it slip right through my fingers. How it was gone in a blink of an eye. 

~~

The flight was about to land, Nicole was still sleeping. "Nicole" I gently shook her arm "we're landing." She moved a little, "hmm.." her eyes fluttered open. "We're landing." I said again, now that she was awake. "Oh.. sorry for sleeping on you the whole flight." she was stretching "I was just so tired and overwhelmed." I kissed her head "it's fine love." I smiled and grabbed her hand.

Once we landed we only had to wait about 5 minutes to get off. I grabbed her bag from overhead and lead her off the plane. We walked off the ramp, I saw Louis standing there, using his phone. "They sent you to come get us?" I laughed and followed him out to the car. "Yeah, we have to hurry up though. We only have an hour or so." He turned to Nicole, "Glad your back!" He said enthusiastically. "Yeah, I am too." She squeezed my hand and smiled. I gave her a kiss and smiled back. To see her smile like that and be happy made me feel so much better. But the question was still on my mind and the answer worried me, where do we go from here? She still doesn't know if she will be able to do this for much longer. Yeah, we're together right now and happy but like she said, every story comes to an end so is this our end?