Skin Deep

15 - Experimenting

The pain in Sana's chest, the burning, tearing feeling in her chest was unbearable, but she couldn't stop. Tears ran down her face as she continued to press her lips against Momo's. The two hid themselves away from people, Momo pressing Sana against the wall and kissing her roughly. Sana's hands held Momo's face in place, pulling her closer and not allowing her to leave. 

"Where is she?!" Jihyo's voice rang out from the hallway. The two pulled away from each other, both breathing heavily. 

"I have to go..." Momo whispered. 

"I know..." Sana sniffed, wiping her tears away. 

"We shouldn't do this..." Momo frowned, resting her forehead against Sana's. "You have a new soulmate..." She winced at the thought. 

"I know..." Sana didn't look up, knowing that her expression was just going to be extremely painful for her to look at. "But you're bound to me..." Sana whispered. "No matter what." She quickly pecked her lips again before sneaking away. Momo ran to join her new members, Jihyo scolding her for being late, but ultimately, the performance still went on.

Sana cleaned her face up quickly, running to sit with her friends. She smiled as she greeted them, the pain finally subsiding in her chest as the lights dimmed. 

"Where were you?" Nayeon whispered to her. 

"Hanging out with Jihyo, she felt nervous." Sana lied. 

Even though Momo was alone, she felt horrible for sneaking days with Sana. She looked up that soulmates could reconnect with their old ones, it was just an extremely painful process, much more painful than the peeling itself. Which explained why Sana cried every time they were together. But she fought through it, wanting to reconnect to Momo. 

"We can't keep doing this.. It hurts you so much..." Momo whispered. Sana stayed quiet, tears falling slowly down her cheeks as she rested on Momo's bare chest. 

"I want to keep doing this..." She whispered. 

"And what about your new soulmate? What are you going to do about her?" Momo frowned. 

"What she won't know... Won't hurt her..." Sana whispered. 

Little did Sana know.. It was hurting her. 

Sooyoung sat in her class, trying her best to focus on the lecture her professor was giving. She was in the middle of taking notes when she felt a burning sensation on her arm. At first it felt like the beginning of a sunburn, but quickly turned into a fire burning feeling. She quickly excused herself, running to the restroom and rolling up her sleeve. That's when she saw it... A new phrase imprinted in her arm.

"No.." she whispered. Tears fell from her cheeks, sudden realization hitting her. "No..." She sniffed. 

"Joy?" Sooyoung looked up, seeing her roommate staring at her. "Are you okay?"

"Fine." She covered her arm, looking at her roommate. "Just.. Stressed. Had to let it out for a moment." She cleaned her face quickly, walking back to class as if nothing had gone wrong. 

Sana sat in the empty apartment, textbooks opened around her in the living room. She was searching for the perfect statistics for her papers. As she highlighted another paragraph, Sooyoung walked in, slipping her shoes off and walking through to their bedroom. 

"I made kimchi rice if you're hungry." Sana called out to her without looking up. 

"Not hungry." Sooyoung mumbled before walking into the bathroom. She locked the door, her right hand running through her hair as she looked at her left forearm. Another phrase... She hated this feeling. Immediately she looked up, no longer seeing the colors she had gotten so used to seeing. All of it fading away as she slid down the door. 

Sana hadn't heard much from Sooyoung, wondering what she was up to. She stood up from the floor, making her way into their shared bedroom. Her bag was on the floor in its usual place, nothing too out of the ordinary. As she walked passed the bathroom she heard a small whimper, followed with a sniffle. 

"Sooyoung?" Sana knocked on the door gently. She heard shuffling from behind the door. "Sooyoung... Are you crying?" She frowned. 

"N-no. I.. I just don't feel good." She heard from the other side. 

"Do you need anything? Are you okay?" Sana reached for the knob, attempting to turn it, but realized it was locked. "Let me in..." She frowned. 

"No. I-I can handle this.." Her voice sounded so broken... It made her wonder if she knew her secret... Sana looked over to find the little key they had for the bathroom. She shoved it in the keyhole, turning the knob and seeing Sooyoung sitting against the tub wall, knees pulled up to her chest and her head in her hands. "Please... Just go." She cried. 

"Sooyoungie... I'm not going to leave you like this... You... You're my soulmate.." Sana frowned, feeling a bitter taste in her mouth. Sooyoung shook her head. 

"I'm not..." She whispered. "I was just... Temporary.." She whispered while showing Sana her arm. Sana's eyes widened, she didn't know if this was her fault, but she blamed herself. 

"No..." Sana shook her head, examining the phrase. She looked down at her arms, not seeing any kind of new phrase on her arms. Her eyes met Sooyoung's tear filled ones, seeing the hurt she was going through... "No.." Sana repeated, tears forming in her own eyes. 

"It was... good while it lasted...." Sooyoung whispered. She looked up at Sana, frowning as she touched her cheek. "At least I got to see color for a little while with you..." She tried to smile, fighting off more tears. "And... I got to be happy for a while.." She whispered. 

"No... I... I'm so sorry..." Sana sobbed into her chest. Sooyoung held her tightly, not wanting to really let any part of their relationship go. It hurt them both to see each other like that. "It's my fault." She cried. 

"No... It's mine... The phrase is on my arm.." She frowned. "Not yours." She sighed. Sana sat with her on the floor, back to Sooyoung's chest as she held her tightly. Sana ran her fingers over the writing, it was slightly raised, just like hers was when hers first appeared. "I just wish we had more time together... Before this..." She sighed, resting her chin on Sana's shoulder. 

"Me too.." She sighed. "Me too..."