They tell me to forgive. But I don't know how to forgive unspeakable crimes and embarrassment to know you. I can't forgive the loneliness I feel because of you. And I can't forgive the irreversible damage done to my head, my heart, and my soul. My soul has been crushed by the weight of you, lost solely in your own selfish ways. Because of you, every day is Halloween, every smile is a mask, and every tear is hidden.
They tell me to respect. But how can I respect a thief, a traitor, and a liar? How can I believe a woman who's lied to me every day since I could crawl? "I love you" should be a safety blanket. Not a costume to wear you feel you have to. Through the smoke and lights of your play, I see the clear flaws. And you, are terrible at plays.
They tell me to work it out. That I should bend. That I am the one who needs to be mature. Somehow, I am to blame for your faults. Somehow, I am the villain. Somehow, you have managed to leave me to a land of exile. They tell me to reconcile. That I should make up, before it's too late. I have been pushed to the point where "too late" is too far away. I have been pushed to the point where my mother, who was supposed to always be there, is a hatred. "Mother" is term that makes me shake my head and roll my eyes, because I know that "Mother" is a liar. "Mother" is a cheater. "Mother" is a facade, a fake, and a pretender. "Mother" never existed.
YOU ARE READING
Chutes and Ladders: Vol. 1
PoetryThis is a collection of my poetry over the past year. It's a very intimate thing for me to share; every word has a back story. I hope you enjoy