Finding Strength [Attack on Titan Fanfic]

• Chapter Six •

     Kira peered around the corner as she saw Levi talk with Commander Erwin. She moved her head back and leaned against the wall. Can't interrupt that. I would be killed. She thought. Both of them are always so serious. She walked down the hallway. She picked at the ends of her sleeves. She sighed. What the hell am I even doing? What do I expect him to do? He was just being nice... right? She thought. She softly pursed her lips before shaking her head softly. She went outside and went over to the steps and sat down. She softly sighed and looked out ahead. She softly tilted her head before blinking as a strand of hair fell against her face. She reached and felt her hair before groaning softly in frustration as she felt the jagged edges. I really need to fix my hair. I'm walking around looking like a fool. She thought.

     She got to her feet and softly stretched. She ran her fingers through her chopped up hair and softly muttered words to herself. She had kept her hair in a bun as best she could but strands would slip out of the bun. She had meant to fix it but had forgotten about it. She walked down the rest of the steps and made her way to her room in the barracks. She arrived and went to her dresser and finding a razor blade that she had hidden. Levi had gone through her room to find any sharp objects after she had recovered. But the blade she hid purposefully before he checked the room. She felt that she needed it for some odd reason and she couldn't part with it. She knew that Levi wouldn't be too pleased about it but she couldn't bring herself to tell him about it.

She went to her desk, sitting down in the chair and looked into the small, cracked mirror. She softly frowned at her own reflection and looked away from it. She looked down at the razor blade in her hand and softly pressed her finger to the sharp edge. She moved her finger away from the sharp edge, trying to take a deep breath. She looked at her own reflection again. She looked at her brown hair and played with it as to try to figure out what haircut to go with, trying to distract herself. How exactly do I go about this? She thought.

     Kira then looked at the razor and stared at it again. She pursed her lips as her thoughts began to race again. She pressed a hand against her forehead as the voice started up again. She squeezed her eyes shut and shakily breathed. Fuck. She thought. She shakily opened her red eyes. Her heart began to pound in her chest and she picked up the razor blade, whispers filling her ears. She tugged at the ends of her sleeves and began to lift one of the sleeves before being startled as there was a knock on the door. She looked at the door, her heart pounding in her chest before dropping the razor blade on the desk and pushing it to the side. She looked up as Levi opened the door.

     "O-oh hi." She said, frazzled. She shakily smiled before blinking as Levi's eyes fell on the razor blade. She followed his gaze before placing her hand over it and covering it. "It's not what it looks like! I swear!"

     Levi looked at her, his expression cold as ever and his gray eyes holding no emotion. He raised an eyebrow slightly and crossed his arms over his chest. "Okay, then explain to me why you have that." He murmured. "I thought I had gotten rid of all of them when I checked your room after that night."