Abyss - Book Five (Man x Man)

Chapter 35 ( M)

His body is shaking as I shove him into our room, watching him pace, the tension and rigid posture make me keep my distance as  I slide down into a chair and take in the sudden turn of events. A previous me might cry, hell, the me of twenty minutes ago was crying but I find all that I have left is anger. 

Anger with Haryek for taking the blame for Loan, with Loan for using me for so long, and myself for allowing him to get so close to me. I knew this was the case, fully aware of the fact that Loan was out for my position, from the moment we went to school together he had hated me, and yet I let him get so close. 

Taking deep breaths, testing my sore lungs, and assuring myself my ribs were not rebroken, finally, my eyes settle back on my warlord. "Are you alright?" I ask him finally. 

My face is wet and I touch my cheek, plucking a piece of stone from my flesh and grimacing as I toss it to the ground. Feeling sick, I've seen more than enough for one day.

How can I survive this? How can I be a King and a soldier? 

I thought this part of my life would be over, I had grown accustomed to that idea. When I look at the pacing wolf, it's not Verando that I see but Alpha. 

He is the same, the embodiment of what I'm feeling. A feral creature drug out the depths, again and again, to fight for our lives and our rights. Climbing to my feet, I approach him and offer my hand for him to smell. "Alpha, I need Randy," I tell him firmly.

 The wolf growls at me, baring his teeth. 

"My hand is fine, I'm fine. Look." I hold out both hands. "You protected me, you got him. It's alright." 

His gray ears lay back, I see his reluctance to leave.

Alpha misses me. I put my arms around his neck as he nuzzles his cheek into my chest, almost knocking the wind out of me with his size. 

I marvel at the softness of his fur only to hold it together as my hand finds a bloody spot. "I miss you, too. I know we haven't seen each other much. But it hurts you to be out." I brush my fingers over his shoulders. 

Those intense eyes lock on me, scanning over me once more, and I stroke his forehead. "We will do something together soon, it's just not safe for everyone to see you. It's not like I can hide you or pretend you're a pet." He wags his tail one time and I smile back at him. "I need Randy, Alpha." 

I watch his eyes change, the pupils shrinking back down and suddenly he's a man before me, falling back onto his butt as his body shakes and recovers from the change. I throw my arms around his neck, just happy he's okay, happy that he's here. To my surprise, he hugs me back just as tightly. His nose finds my neck, taking in my scent. 

"I sensed your fear and then I heard all the commotion. I saw Acer- the red hair- I thought-" He'd walked into a scene in which I was being slaughtered, thankfully, it was the wrong red-haired mage. "I'm so glad you're alright. Well, mostly." 

"It couldn't have been me, you'd be dead, too." 

He exhales, taking a moment to calm his pounding heart. The heat of his body melts into me, I feel it in my core, the rage and malice of the wolf eating away at the part of me that's linked to him. The bloodlust, the desire for vengeance, "That's intense..." I murmur.

Verando gives me a tired look, "Imagine being on this side of it. I want to kill him, I want to hunt him down and watch him suffer. He killed your friends, reason enough before he tried to kill you as well. Are you alright?" His head tilts as he takes in my cheek and brushes another bit of gravel out. "You're going to need Helen to look at that."

In all that's happened, all I can think about is my lack of willingness to have Helen touch me. "Well, he's a political prisoner now. He'll face a trial."