"We're Just Friends."

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My heart is pounding as I pull up to Ky's house. My palms are sweaty and my hands are shaking.

What the fuck just happened?!

Did I really just make out with Jace?!

I cannot stop thinking about him.

No matter how hard I try.

As I pull into Ky's driveway he walks out with his arms folded. He's walking slow, taking his time and I'm sitting in the car just watching him with my heart in my stomach.
He's upset.
He finally gets in the car and slams the door.

"Ky, baby, I'm sorry." He continues to look away from me.

"Baby please look at me." I place my fingers on his face and ask him to look at me. He continues to look out the window.

"I'm so sorry Ky." I say in a pleading voice.
He still ignores me, not realizing that I'm apologizing for more than just 'being late'.
I pull out of the driveway and just drive...
I'm thinking of a place that he loves that can surprise him and make him happy...

I got it!

It's this restaurant that he's been wanting to go to since he was like 12 because he heard they had a chocolate volcano cake.....
Anyway, I began to look up the directions on my phone.
As I unlock my phone I get a notification.

From Jace:
I need you.😢
-End Text-

I reply to him because I automatically think the worse.

To Jace:
What's wrong? Are you okay? 😟

From Jace:
I want you. 💋

To Jace:
Jace, I can't do this right now. I'm with Ky.

-End text-

He doesn't reply....

Just then the silence breaks.

"Where are we going Baylor?" Kyler asks in a submissive way.

His voice made me jump a little.

"Oh, um it's a surprise."
I forgot to look up the directions. I exit out of Jace's text messages and get the directions.

After 20 minutes of painful silence we pull up to Chima's (the restaurant) and I get Ky's attention. He's on his phone.
I clear my throat.
He looks up.
I hear a slight gasp.
He looks at me with a blank expression.

"Shall we?" I say gesturing toward his car door.

We get out the car and we began walking.
As we are both in arms length he stops walking and grabs my arm and pulls me so that I'm turned toward his face.
I look him in the eyes.
He puts his hand on my cheek and brings my face closer to him and then he kissed me.
It wasn't a peck, but it wasn't aggressive either.
It was a good simple passionate kiss.
It was amazing.
I love him.
No doubt about it.
But, of course, I'm still thinking of Jace.
After we finished making up a little in front of the car, he looks me in the eyes and says "I love you."
"I love you more Kyler" I respond.

He grabs my hand and intertwines our fingers.
We walk in.

We go in and get seated and order our food.
Kyler didn't even get food he just got that damn cake. After the waiter brought it to him he told the waiter that he loved her. It was hilarious. The waiter looked so uncomfortable so that just made it twice as funny. I almost choked on my food.

I figure I should go to the bathroom before we leave so I get up and walk to the bathroom.
As I'm walking from the bathroom I see ky has my phone. My heart drops.

"Hey, what's up?" I take my phone out of his hands.

"You got a text.....from Jace." He says in a sad-ish tone.

My heart is literally in my ass.

"You went through my phone Kyler?"
I say scared as hell.

"No, you changed you password? Your password was suppose to be your birthday. Why'd you change it Baylor?" His voice is sort of flat now.

"Oh, no reason. Hey, do you mind Not trying to snoop through my phone next time?"

"I wasn't tryin-- *sigh* Baylor why're you still talking to him? I thought we established that your connection with him is done."

"You're not going to control my life Kyler. I can talk to whoever I want." Those words sounded kinda sharp coming out of my mouth.

Kyler stands up and begins to walk out.
I stand up and grab his arm.

"Ky wait don't leave, I'm sorry. Sit down, please."
He sat down.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to come out like that. What I meant to say was, I just don't want to be tied down right now." I tried to explain.

"So being in a relationship with me is tying you down?" He asks sort of aggravated.

"No, I just mean in general. I just don't want to have a relationship where I can't trust you to not go through my phone." I said.

"You're right. I'm sorry. Just look me in the eyes and promise me there is nothing going in between you two."
He said in a pleading voice.

"I promise."
I don't know why I just promised Kyler that. I mean in a way I do know because how would it have looked if I said no?
I'm not trying to play with him or anything but at the same time I need to find out what I need, and being tied down isn't allowing me to do that. Once I figure out where I'm at it's gonna be different.
I'm at a very confusing time in my life and I need to explore my options.

But, I can't do that with the fear of ky leaving me again.