Rescued From Shadows

Chapter Fourteen

The next few days went very similar to the day before with Maedhros getting up, eating breakfast, going to the balcony in Mildor's room with Fingon to read more. Yet, it was mid-day when Mildor came over and sent Fingon out of the room. Maedhros eyed Mildor with concern as he sat down across from him, "It's okay. I just want to talk to you in private." He said.

"Alright," Maedhros said closing his book and looking at Mildor.

"I know it's hard to handle with what happened. Yet, I would like to start working on it with you but I won't if you are not ready." Mildor said.

"I...I wank to get passed it," Maedhros said. "It's hard and the worst is...at times I don't know if everything that's been happening here is...is real."

"It's real, I am real. The chair you're sitting in? That's real. Fingon who's pacing back and forth outside the door. That's real too. Just as Huan's head laying in your lap, that's real." He said.

Maedhros nodded and swallowed hard. He took a soft breath and said, "I want to get passed but-"

"-you're not ready to start?" Mildor asked.

"Yeah," Maedhros replied. Mildor nodded and handed Maedhros a small journal.

"Alright. Until you are try writing in this, you can write and put anything you want in here. You do not have to show anyone it's just for you." Mildor said.

"I can't write in it," Maedhros said looking at his left hand.

"The writing doesn't have to be neat besides if you are worried about what someone may think of how your writing will look. You can practice here," Mildor said as he still held the book out. Maedhros nodded and took the small journal and placed it next to him.

"Can...can you let Fingon back in here?" Maedhros asked.

"Yes but I want you to try walking around a bit more," Mildor said. Maedhros gave a nod and settled back in the chair. He looked over as Fingon came in but this time the twins were with him.

"Ambarussa," Maedhros said with a smile as the twins hugged him. He hugged back and they stepped back after a few moments.

"Nelyo! You would never guess what happened today," Amras said.

"Or you may but I don't think you will," Amrod finished for his twin. They waited as they looked at him waiting for him to guess. Yet, Maedhros just shook his head and both the twins grinned brightly. They then started to tell Maedhros about how they got stuck on part of a cliff but they found a way to go sledding down it without breaking their bones. Yet, what they found to use as a sled did hit a rock and sent them both into a stream where Amrod's hand landed on a fish. Maedhros just listened to the story with a smile. An old part of him wanted to scold them for getting stuck like that in the first place since they should have known better. Yet, he just didn't think he had it in him right then so he just sat there while they contiued on with their day.

"I hate to interrupt but you should walk around Maedhros," Mildor said stopping the twin's tale just as they got to a prake they tried pulling on Caranthir. Maedhros nodded and slowly stood up. Fingon stood up but stayed back a bit to let Maedhros try it on his own. Maedhros slowly walked around the room back and forth from the far wall back to the chair.

"How does it feel?" Mildor asked.

"Good," Maedhros replied as he took a few more steps.

"Alright. A few more moments then rest," He then said. Maedhros nodded and walked around for a bit longer. Once he was done he settled down in his chair. Once he sat down the twins shared a little look and stood up and hugged Maedhros tightly. When they pulled back Maedhros frowned as he saw both twins had tears in their eyes.

"Ambarussa?" He asked looking at the pair before him. Both twins used a sleeve to dry their eyes before looking at him.

"We are fine," Amras said.

"Yeah. Just have something in our eye," Amrod added. Maedhros looked at them as they gave him another hug before they pulled back.

"Well. We better go," Amrod said.

"Yeah. We actually are going to help Curufin with something," Amras explained.

"Alright," Maedhros said. He waved the twins goodbye and settled back. He looked at Huan who looked back up at him. He rubbed his head and looked at Fingon.

"Finno? I would like to go back to my room," Maedhros said.

"Alright," Fingon said. He gathered their books and walked with Maedhros across the hall. Once they got there Maedhros moved and sat by the window and gazed out. Fingon put down the books and sat down by him.

"Maedhros? What's wrong?" Fingon asked.

"It's nothing," Maedhros replied.

"I know something's up, it is okay. You can talk to me about it." Fingon said.

"I told her I'd keep my eyes on them. I am the oldest, I am supposed to protect them. I am the one they should be able to look up too." Maedhros said clenching the fabric of the tunic. "Yet, all I did since we got here is get captured. Made them worry about me and feel sorry for me. I am not supposed to be like this! I am supposed to be strong! I am not supposed to be...to be weak like this."

"Nelyo. It's alright, you'll get better. All you-" But Maedhros cut his friend off by turning his head sharply.

"Alright? Finno I can't go to the bathroom alone since I may start to hallucinate! I struggle with just taking a few steps and I have to take who knows much herbs to just let me sleep. It is not alright! I won't be like how I used to be! You can't even start to imagine what I went through there! What those monsters did to me...what they forced me to do. Forced me to realize." Maedhros snapped he then swallowed and hug his head. A choked sob quietly came out of his mouth as he curled in on himself. "I am not going to get better Finno...." He whispered quietly.

"Mayo," Fingon said and put his hand on Maedhros's shoulder. Yet, he pulled away and shook his head.

"Just go. I want to be alone," Maedhros muttered.

"Maedhros," Fingon said a bit more firmly.

"Just go Fingon! I want to be alone...please....just leave me alone." Maedhros pleaded. Fingon look at his friend with a broken heart. He nodded and stood up.

"Alright. I'll be right outside if you do need me," Fingon said as softly as he could. Maedhros ignored him and just looked out the window brokenly. Fingon sighed and stepped out of the room, he sighed deeply as once the door closed he heard silent crying. Fingon clenched his fists as he moved and sat against on the floor against the wall. It wasn't far; not fair at all.