when you love someone | rosé + lisa | chaelisa

8 - Study Session

Saying that I was shocked would be an understatement.

I was utterly dumbfounded, bewildered, whatever other word that could possibly describe this feeling.

Lisa went the whole day without talking to me, and then suddenly decides she wants to help me just as I'm about to go home?

"Get your stuff. We're going to the study hall." She says, an irritated look taking over her features. As if i didn't hear her the first time. "The study hall is too loud. I don't like it there." I complained, in attempt to get out of today's session. "Then we'll go to the library." She offered, looking away from me as if I was some sort of burden to her eyes.

I hated the library. I hated classrooms, and I hated being around people other than family and friends. I wanted to be in the comfort of my own home. But I wasn't gonna invite someone like lisa into my house. Only the dumb side character in some stupid horror movie would do something like that.

"I don't really... enjoy... being in the library either." I dragged out, knowing she had lost her patience with me the second I notice her drawing closer. In no time, she had a tight grip on my collar and pulled me up from my seat. "The sooner we get there, the sooner this hell will be over." She hissed before she began dragging me to the dreaded library.

It was embarrassing to say the least, the people watching and laughing, whispering as their eyes ran all over me. The entire way, I tried my best to keep my head down, focusing my attention on lisa's grip, she wasn't letting go anytime soon.

Once the library was in view, she took an unexpected  turn down a deserted hall and past the teachers lounge.

"W... the library is that way, where are you going?" I said as I jerked backward, trying to pull us back in the right direction. She didn't answer me, and instead tugged me into the school stock room. The room that's only touched every other summer.

"Since you're so picky and annoying," She began as she closed the door behind me and opened the blinds, "We're studying here."

I noticed two empty desks along with chairs, planted neatly by the window, facing each other. The pretty stripes of orange sunlight seeped into the room, highlighting everything including the stacked shelves, a subtle tint of gold. Lisa lulled over to her seat and opened her books and her notes, elusively inviting me to sit as well.

I carefully slid into the seat across from her, the only other seat, and followed her actions by taking out my studying materials too. Without any words or glances, she pulled out what seemed to be a small radio from her bag, toying with the buttons and stopping at a station that played some soothing music.. the type without lyrics.

"You know you could just play music from your phone right?" I teased, surprised someone like her would carry around a radio, nonetheless actually use it. "My phone speaker sucks." She stated, quick to dismiss my remark.

"So uhm... how exactly do you study?" I inquired, genuinely interested as to how she manages to maintain such high marks.

She sits up straight, as if her posture wasn't princess-like already, and clears her throat.

I uncomfortably sit back, afraid she going to deliver a speech.

"First, I open a textbook and read the pages that correspond to the current unit we're on, and read ahead so that I have something to go on whenever we start a new unit..."

For the first time ever I'm able to hear her speak gently, her words no longer as sharp as staples, pinning my tongue down from saying anything in response to her usual threats.

"...Then I summarize the key points or ideas that are important, and write them into my notes. After that, I'll practice on challenge questions from old test packets or study guides, and submit them to a teacher or look online to see if I got them correct—"

The entire time while she spoke, I couldn't help but zone out. Her words blocked out and sounding like a foreign language to me. I watched how her eyes wandered calmly over her notes and back over to me as she continued talk as if it were nothing.

"I reuse the tactics I chose to solve each question and pick the one that works best for me. Usually, it's best to memorize several strategies so in case one doesn't work, you don't have to panic and can try different things out. But the main strategy is the most crucial to memorize because it'll normally work for everything."

I couldn't do anything but stare blankly, in a complete trance. Nothing but the sound of the soft music floating in the air between us. It bothered me how composed and poised she was as I sat there astonished and trying to process her words.

I'm so stupid for thinking this girl just had it in her. That determination made her admirable in a way.

It was too long before I noticed I was staring and she sent a sharp kick into my shin. "It's your turn, idiot. explain your study methods that obviously don't work." She said, rolling her eyes. "They've worked for a while!" I defended, bringing my legs back so they aren't such an easy target.

"Clearly not anymore."

I huffed, contemplating on what to tell her. My grades would've been fine if I just decided to turn in assignments, but I've just been all over the place lately with so much stuff going on.

"I've been lazy." Lie.

A silence between us engulfed the already uncomfortable atmosphere. Somehow I felt like she knew I was lying, and I knew she wanted to tell me she knew. But she did nothing but stare at me with those prying eyes of hers and turned away to begin studying.

You'd think I'd feel like I was in danger, being in such close proximity to my bully. It was awkward as hell for sure, but I never felt scared. In a weird way, her silence gave me comfort. It meant she wasn't angry.

After getting distracted countless times using my own method, I tried her way of studying and felt a rush of information barricade me. No doubt I got stuck on multiple occasions and needed to reboot every once in a while.

I really wanted to ask her how she did it so easily, but that would be embarrassing and this was only the first session for a month.

I still have some time to get used to it.

—to get used to being around her.