when you love someone | rosé + lisa | chaelisa

16

I couldn't read Lisa's face as she stepped back to let me in, nothing but a glimpse of curiosity dancing in her eyes. Without saying a word, I slowly lumber over to my desk and sit down, exhausted. My legs are sore from all the running and my head spinning from Soojin's punches.

The adrenaline had diminished long ago and the pain was starting to settle in... mostly around my face.

I perched my elbows onto the cold desk and hurriedly covered my face with my hands. I could feel my body trembling. Even the sound of the door shutting made me flinch.

I squeezed my eyes shut in frustration and massaged my eyelids as I tried to drown out the silence engulfing the room. I could feel the awkward tension between Lisa and I. Not only had I not said anything to her but yesterday was... weird to figure out.

When I could hear her stepping closer to me, a warm liquid trickled down into my hand and between my fingers. I would've mistaken it for tears if I hadn't saw the deep red pooling in my palms. The sight made my heart drop. I felt sick. No surprise, it's coming from the eye Soojin sucker punched earlier

But I wasn't exactly worried about myself, or the fact I had never bled from my eye. What made me anxious was the fact that I got my friends involved and allowed it to escalate this far. How would we escape tomorrow?

"This is my fault. I'm so stupid."

Peeking at my desk, I noticed the blood dripping down from my chin onto a worksheet neatly placed below me. I lean back in my chair, aggravated that my work was now covered in blood. It began to slip down between the small gap of my palm and cheek, smearing everywhere and dribbling onto my clothes when I tried to wipe it away.

I could feel myself begin to hyperventilate as I desperately tried to keep my eye from bleeding. I was panicking. My chest constricted and my throat ran dry.. Squeezing my eyes shut and holding my hands over my eyes, I repeatedly counted to ten in my head.

I knew this feeling too well.

That's when I felt a familiar pair of hands grab onto my wrists.

Slowly and carefully pulling my hands away from my face, I open my eyes to see Lisa squatting down beside my chair. The feeling of her hands grabbing onto me helped a bit as I recalled I wasn't in the room alone.

"What happened?" She asks, seemingly unfazed at the sight of blood. I only free my hands from her and look the other way. It's not that I can't speak, but I'd rather be by my myself right now, so I could wallow in my own self doubts. Pretty stupid considering I chose to come here as a scapegoat.

She says something else but once again, I tune myself out and ignore her, trying to stop the blood and my hands from trembling. She observes my face, not breaking the obvious scrutinizing glare until I finally glance in her direction.

"What?" I snap, distressed and eager for her to stop making me anxious with her odd stares.

She shrugs.

"Stop looking at me."

She purses her lips together before standing, still eyeing me suspiciously until the moment she fully turns around, and makes her way behind the shelves. I can hear her shuffling through boxes and drawers. Curious as to what she's doing but not curious enough to go check, I sigh and lay my head in my hands.