Sanders Sides Angst-Shots!

They don't care. [Roman]

Requested by: impansexuwhale

Pairing?: none.

Triggers: Self-harm, hurt/no comfort, unsympathetic Patton, unsympathetic Logan, unsympathetic Virgil, suicidal thoughts, drug abuse, cursing.

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Roman stood in front of a mirror, his back leaned against a locked door. His skin was pale and his eyes were red and puffy. God, what was he doing? He's supposed to be a prince. How could he protect his family with these wounds?

He couldn't get the thoughts out of his head. It was so annoying, and tonight was movie night. He got out bandages and put them around his arms. He popped eight pain killers, some for his pain. Some to take the edge off. It made him feel so much better when he was on a buzz in the clouds. He'd be fine.

I don't wanna be fine.
He thought to himself, before his thoughts continued on.
I want to foam at the mouth and fall asleep. I never want to open my eyes again. Just let these pills kill me. Let the prince be slain.

He shuddered as he pushed away the thoughts. No. No. Thomas needed bin to stay alive. That mattered. He mattered. Roman rolled down his sleeves and secured them with his sleeve buttons. He hoped the bandages didn't show through his clothes.
He breathes slowly, before he walked out of the bathroom and travels down to the living room.

Patton groaned, hitting the couch with his hands like a child. "It took you long enough! I wanna watch the movie with you guys!" He said impatiently. He sounded like a child who hadn't had their nap.

Roman nodded, sitting on the couch and pressing play. They were watching the live action 'Beauty and The Beast.'
He loved the fact that they were recreating his favorite Disney movies. That made him happy. He liked the old versions but they still had 90's views and he was all about modern acceptance.
He focused in on the movie, feeling the buzz the pills gave him as the pain in his arms. Actually, all feeling in his arms, faded away. He felt himself fade out a bit, but he still listened to the movie as his head rolled back and he leaned into the couch.

~~~~

Roman heard the actor for Gaston speak. Before it suddenly was interrupted with a gasp. A gasp from Patton. He looked up and looked around "What?! Whats wrong?!" He jumped up off the couch.

Patton pointed at Roman's arms, and then he heard Logan speak up "there is blood soaked into your sleeve." He spoke coldly.
Roman felt his throat close to and his stomach sink.
"Guys-- listen. It's not what you think--" roman tried to reason when patton cut him off.
Patton sighed, annoyed "seriously? You had to get blood all over the white shirt? How will I ever get that out, huh?" Patton spoke. Patton obviously didn't care about the fact that it looked like roman was self harming. He was worried about the stain.

Virgil made a 'tch' noise before he rolled his eyes. "Oh boohoo. Princely feels a little upset so he has to stress Pat out more. Good job, Prince whiney." He mocked. Wait-- Virgil didn't care either?

Logan interjected "why did you even do that? You don't even have a direct connection to the emotions like patton does. You can't feel depression. Statistically, you are doing it for attention."
Roman felt a stabbing pain in his chest. None of them cared? He never wanted them to find out...but he wanted them to care.

Virgil sighed "oh course he's doing it for attention. He's always been such a needy attention-whore." He spoke with a voice laced with poison. Roman felt his eyes begin to water. He didn't want to watch the movie anymore. He sunk out before they could speak once more.

He rose up into his room and he felt a violent sob escape his mouth. One became two. And then he spiralled into violent crying and sobbing. He hiccuoed and tried to breathe but he couldn't.
They didn't care!
They never did!
Why would they?!
All you do is cause problems, you fucking mistake!
Kill yourself. You'll make everything better if you just kill yourself.

He looked down and saw a razor blade. When did that get there? He didn't care. He pulled up his sleeve forcibly and he ripped off the bandages. They didn't help. Of course they didn't.
Roman snarled at himself, "god. I am so--...so whiney. I deserve this." He said through his whimpered crying. Angry crying. Desperate crying. What was it anymore other than judt crying?

So desperate for attention. Poor, poor roman. He'll never be loved. You may love them but they've never cared. And they never will.

Roman sliced his skin open. He went deep. He felt the relief and the need for more. More blood. More pain.
He placed his arm, and then he did again. Over and over, it never stopped. His arm was gushing blood before he stopped. The pain made him stop.

He shakily dropped the blade, and he stumbled into the bathroom attached to his bedroom. He took out a bottle of pills and he downed the whole thing. He chewed and dry swallowed. It made his throat burn.
He walked over to the shower and turned it on. He stepped in with his clothes on, not even letting the water warm up. He let the water run over him and wash away the blood. But he could never see the cuts from the rate the blood was gushing.

They never cared.
And now, they may never get the chance to care.

But, why would they care,
When roman is just being a

Stresser
Needy
Attention whore
Whiney

Why would they ever care?

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Hey! Sorry this took a little longer than planned. I hoped you enjoyed!

Word count: 970