This time, no more tears I have to let go so I could be whole once again. Accept everything that keeps my emotion brick into pieces and I just hope for nothing but the best. –disappear in this cruel world.
Tonight while I am on my tip of my patience trying to fix broken pieces without any doubt I become vulnerable in every person lives. I want things to happen by chance of surprise and oppurtunity so I could cover up my imperfections and incompleteness in the eyes of my fellow who I look up to. I wonder if they look up to me as well, they make me feel like I am no one but a human with no such skills nor talent to reach any up there. My eyes are like the water flowing into my hands as I wash the bottles for the next hours of feeding. Like my eyes have been peirced by your thorns and shed blood. Until I run out and knew that people are just dust. Dust around us that distract our own peace because of our own willingness and act of freedom. Each piece of me flies within the wind until I am left with nothing but bones and skull, then maybe all the mistakes and failures will be worth it. They always say "Everything happens for a reason" and I am still on my way for the reasons of all this shit!
Especially that I am now someone I am not prepared to face on my own. Responsibilities. Foremost, I don’t know why this came to life.
he said
'hindi ako nagbigay sayo nyan, panahon".
A phrase that hit me straight to my dhama.
time is everything i know. and I wonder if I hadn’t thought enough that made my cells and veins tangled forms in a zigzag then maybe I have become the right woman in everyone’s eyes or even the good daughter my father had been dreaming or the daughter my mother's been figuring. my brain stop from functioning, she did not stop me from wondering it’s right or wrong because everything just felt so right.
