In My Head

Prologue

You know how some people have reoccurring dreams? I, unfortunately, am one of those people. My dreams might not be the same per say; but they all consist of the same person. I saw him every time I closed my eyes. He was tall, mysterious, and so very handsome. His bright amber eyes, milky white hair, and chiseled features haunted my nights.

I didn't know why I was always seeing him considering I'd never met him before in my life. His world was full of monsters, mages, and dragons; whereas mine was filled with the stuff of comic books. I recalled countless times when I closed my eyes to see him in some pub with glares of disgust being sent his way. They called him a monster more often then naught even after all the help he gave them by killing their real monsters. He didn't seem to notice that I was always there, listening when he talked to his horse.

It was sad to see how lonely he truly was. Oh, how I wished I could heal that look in his eyes. At first, when he appeared in my dreams, I thought it was just my mind running wild; creating some far-off place for me to escape to. After a while I just figured that I liked the dream so much it was the only one I wanted. He was the only one I wanted; but like a dream, it was never to come true. He didn't even know I existed. Even if he did, he'd never want me.

It was no different tonight when drifted off and unfortunately saw him in a brothel. Those nights were never fun for me. My heart always hurt at the sight and thought. Which was stupid considering he wasn't even real. As soon as it started getting hot and heavy, I left the room. Thankfully I wasn't tied to him enough that I was forced to watch it all go down. I walked from the room down the stairs where some dark-haired man known as, Jaskier, was singing as he played his lute.

I smirk he played 'Toss A Coin To Your Witcher' a somewhat ballad of my mysterious man's conquests. As the room joins in, I glance back up the stairs for a moment before I force myself outside where his horse, Roach, was tied to a post outside. Smiling I offer the roan mare a gentle pat and a soft hello. I didn't know if she knew I was there or not but I found solace in her quiet manner.

"Ah, Roach, you're the only one I can talk to. Even if you can't hear me." I saw as I sit down on the bar's veranda. "I must be stupid as hell, to still be in love with a man who can't see nor hear me. Especially when I have one that loves me in my own world." I pause as I place my elbows on my knees and my face in my hands.

"God... I feel like every time I come here; I'm cheating on him. Even though nothing ever happens, nor would it. I wish so hard that I could just dream about something, or more importantly someone else. Maybe even my own boyfriend." Blowing a raspberry, I pull my hands away from my face and looking into Roach's dark eyes continue, "Even he thinks I'm crazy, though he would never tell me."

Taking a deep breath, I look up into the starry night sky and let out a heavy sigh. When would I wake from this nightmare? I honestly couldn't wait a moment longer as I try to send mental images to myself to wake up. "Come on (Name), wake up." I say furrowing my brow.

"Come now Geralt, why must we leave now?" Jaskier's voice calls pulling my attention. "We were both having a good time, you more so than I."

"You don't have to come along." Geralt replies walking over to Roach to untie her reins from the post.

"Honestly Geralt, when was the last time you slept?" Jaskier asks causing Geralt to let out an annoyed sigh. "Oh, I know what this is about." Jaskier continues placing a hand on his hip. "This is about that girl, isn't it?" Geralt pauses his eyes narrowing slightly as his hand grips tightly to the leather straps on his saddle.

"Oh, this should be good." I say as I stand up and walking closer to Geralt, gently pat Roach's neck as I wait for his reply.

"The one you see in your dreams." Jaskier continues causing me to cock an eyebrow in surprise. "The one you can't stop thinking about. What was her name again?"

"That's enough." Geralt replies his amber eyes moving from his saddle to meet the bards in warning.

"Who do you see in your dreams?" I ask knowing I won't get an answer; but hoping maybe I might get lucky.

Before I have a chance to get a reply, I feel myself being pulled from my dreams and open my eyes to see Bucky gently moving my hair out of my face. I silently cursed him for waking me up before I could find out more. He offers me a soft smile and all is forgiven.

"Good morning beautiful." Bucky says gently placing a kiss on my lips.

"Morning." I reply into his lips as I roll over onto my side to wrap my arms around his chest.

"(Name)," Bucky moans reluctantly pulling away as he continues, "As much as I want to continue this, we have work. Steve texted; he has a new mission for us."

"Boo," I reply pulling my hand from around his neck to gently run my fingers across his morning stubble. "I'll go on one condition."

"Oh, and what's that?"

"As soon as it's over, me and you spend a whole week away from everything, doing nothing but fucking. All day long, every day." He snickers at your proposal.

"Only you could make that sentence sound so appealing."