Alpha Knox

Chapter 24

UNEDITED

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"Cayson," I paused for a moment, trying to collect the right words to say, "promise me you will get to know Eli, promise me you'll give him a chance."

His eyes left mine and stared at the floor, he shook his head softly, "I-I can't do that Luna, I don't want to hurt anyone, that's the last thing I want, but... I'm not gay. I'm not into guys like that." He cried out, tears welling up in his eyes.

I gave him a bear like hug, one he accepted gratefully. I've never thought of Cayson being sensitive, let alone crying heavily in my shoulder.

I can't imagine how confused he must feel.
Believing you were someone when in reality, you're someone completely different.

It's a good thing I'm just me, a girl who is also a wolf, and who can eat my weight in donuts in less that twenty five minutes. Which is something I'm quite proud of.

But I'm not struggling like Cayson is, I've never been exposed to a side of myself without warning. I've never had to learn to accept myself and others in the way he is.
Yeah, I've had to accept myself and my body, but not in the way he is.

"Rosette, Luna," he sniffed, removing himself from our hug to sit himself down on his bed. "What if I can't... can't go through with it? If I reject h-him..." he sighed, "how do I live with myself, knowing I caused him pain like that? W-what if I... I.... I don't know."

"Cayson, you better not be talking about suicide!" I shouted, my hands grabbing his, "you have so much here for you Cayson, I can't say I won't be sad and upset if you recent Eli, but I will always support you and be by your side. You have become my family. If you hurt yourself in any way, a part of myself will die off. So don't you dare! You don't want to hurt a pregnant woman so you?"

I've never said that aloud before... hehe!

He mumbled, "no, I don't. Not at all."

I gave him a small reassuring hug, "you need to go on a run, then take a nap. Run until you can't run anymore, free your wolf and let him roam the territory. You need to relax your mind. Then come back here, and rest. That will help, and if you need me, I'll be here. Always."

"Thank you." Cayson sighed, closing his eyes to take a deep breath, I followed him out of his room, shutting the door behind me.

As he left downstairs, I wandered off to find my mom. It means so much that Knox had brought her up here. It's such a simple gesture, but one that means more than the world to me.

Smelling her daisy scented perfume, I knocked on her door.
As soon as the door opened, her face lit up with the biggest smile I've seen on her face since the time my dad surprised her with a candle lit dinner in the middle of the forest with twinkle lights strung in the trees.

"Oh my sweet little Rose bud!" She exclaimed, giving me a large hug.

She placed her hands on my belly and sighed, "oh hello there my sweet grand babies!" She giggled with excitement, "I'm excited to meet you! And your grandpa is only just over an hour away!"
She rubbed my belly, leaning over slightly so her face was closer to my belly bump.
She looked up at me with joyful eyes, "are you feeling better? I've been so worried!" Her eyebrows furrowed together as concern washed over her small tan heart shaped face.
I took in her appearance, her hair was pulled back in a low bun, a few stray pieces framing her face. She had on her usual makeup look, a pale nude eyeshadow with brown eyeliner but no wing, and mascara and a tinted chapstick. Unlike some women, she embraced her age and didn't feel the need to use all the extra makeup to hide her 'flaws' that some say come with age.
Wearing a knee length grey dress, a olive green cardigan and matching kitten pumps, she looked put together. More so than me that's for sure.

"I've been feeling fine, I'm just a little exhausted I guess. I was just helping a freines of mine with a problem he's facing but I wanted to see you." I smiled, my eyes looking into my mother's dark brown eyes that always reminded me of dark chocolate chips.

"Oh my beautiful daughter, you've always had a heart bigger than mountains." She said softly, running one of her hands through my hair, "did you want to watch a movie and talk? We haven't done that in so long!"

It was true, we used to watch movies together at least twice a week and just talk about what's going on in our lives. My mother and I have always had a close knit bond, especially since there's more males than females in the family, it's always been nice to have that one on one time with her.
"Sure, but can we paint our nails? Mine look naked and afraid." I laughed, looking down at my bare nails.

"Of course! I brought a handful of options, hoping we could do something girly together." She waved her hands in the air as she spoke on about the fun things she brought, including face masks and matching robes with slippers.

Two movies later, I was half asleep on my moms bed. Nails painted, fuzzy robe and slippers on, and wore out.
I never expected to be so tired but I guess the growing babies inside of me have been using my energy too.
My mom leaned over me and whispered, "I'm going to video chat your dad in the bathroom so you can sleep, I don't want to be too loud."

I mumbled an "okay." Before she tip toed to the bathroom.
I could overhear her talking to my dad about how I'm doing and how she's excited to meet her first grand-babies.

I was about to pass out when I heard her say something that confused me to no end, "when do we tell her? Knox said to wait after the pregnancy before anyone tells her, for her safety as well as the babies. But is waiting the safest? With who knows what kind of magic she may hold, she could harm herself if she doesn't know."

Magic? What does she mean by that?

Werewolves are considered magic beings, but we can't produce or use magic unless we have the gene in us.
But there's no way that magic like that would have anything to do with me... right?

I know my father is pure wolf, he shifts every full moon. And my mother, she's shifted before too.

I felt my body slowly become heavy as I laid on her soft bed that adjust to my position in my side. My eyelids began to grow heavy as sleep began to over come me, only to jolt me wide awake with a terrifying image playing in my head. My body became paralyzed as the mental movie began playing itself inside my head, blinding me from seeing anything else's

I was being held down by Conner, forced to do something I didn't want to do. He forced himself on me as I clawed at him to get off, tears streaming down my face as I screamed for Knox to rescue me.

What the hell?

After the scene flashed in my head and eyes, I stood up to get help from my mom and ask her to take me to Knox, but I collapsed on the floor with a thud.

Please moon goddess, please don't let that be a sign of what I'll be going through... I'm afraid...

I opened my mouth to shout out for Knox and my mother, but nothing came out. It's as if I lost my voice due to the fear and shock racing through my veins.

Moon goddess, if you can hear me, please watch over me and help me. Guide me through my daily schedule and allow me to stay strong. I'm not sure what I just witnessed but allow me to over come it.
For not only my sake, but for my children's as well.