For Fuck's Sake

l e a v i n g

hey guys

it's your old attention seeker :)

so I get that it's been super long since I came to wattpad, and it's kinda sad when people who you thought were super duper close just unfollow you because you didn't talk to anyone for super long.

I know I sound like a whiny bitch but, that's the reason I made this book.

I'm seriously considering to leave wattpad. I've always had a more toxic relationship here than anywhere else and I'll tell you a few incidences I feel like letting out.

If I'm being honest,  I used to be such a fake bitch,  I'm not kidding.

I would try getting followers any way I can,  but that never happened when I was trying to make friends.

Every friend attempt is and was genuine. For all my friends who actually gave a shit and still follow me now,  I stg I love them sm.

Look,  two years ago,  there were a lot of incidences which made me feel extremely  sad or angry.

There was this one author (ex friend ig) who told me that she was excited for her book dedications in my private chat,  so I kinda expected she'd write my name too (I was 13 and a dumbass,  don't @ me)  and when she didn't I went and asked her why she didn't do that.

I don't talk to her anymore and I guess it's my fault, but I didn't understand her telling me about her book dedications  when she wasn't gonna add my name anyway.

I had this other friend who really meant a lot to me,  and IDK, she suddenly blocked me,  then unblocked me,  then she unfollowed me,  then she followed me again and I was acting really weird at that time,  because I just wanted her to treat me like her friend too. She would always talk about everyone being close to her and she was so nice to everyone,  I wanted her to have that with me.

She was a part of my life since I started wattpad and I was a part of hers since she started wattpad too.

So to make her follow me back (I was super desperate) I used to tell her how much she meant to me because she really meant a lot.

But then at the end,  she told me that she thought that I was super fake and I should suck her dick so then I left it at that.

I've always blamed so many people but maybe I'm the problem LMFAO.  And no,  I'm not pitying myself,  I'm just kinda sad.

After seeing a bunch of other people unfollow me I decided to take a break.

That's why I haven't updated in so long.

Aishu, Aisha, Ray,  Sandy,  Sarah,  Sandy,  Zoe, Ruth, Leah, Adreen, Haya, Iris, Samiha, Noor, Vera,  Maya, thanks so much for IDK, just being there for me y'know. You guys are amazing and I seriously love you guys. 

I'll still update,  but I seriously need new memories to actually start over on wattpad.

Thank you.