Him | A Kim Namjoon Fanfiction | COMPLETED

Five

Namjoon peered round the door, a worried expression on his face.

"Mia? Whats wrong?" His voice was a soft whisper, I couldnt stop myself from crying even more when I heard the caring tone in his voice. "Oh, hunni. Im sorry"

I felt his weight on the bed as he came and laid beside me, scooping me up in a hug. We stayed like that for what felt like hours. He rubbed my back and I cried into his chest. I always felt safer with him. After a while I had no more tears left in me to cry anymore.

"Im sorry." I whispered, pulling away slightly to look up at his face, only to be greeted by my favourite smile.

"You have nothing to apologise for, Mia. I know its a sensitive subject. Im so sorry he asked."

I nuzzled my face back into his chest and before long, we were asleep.

* * *

Neither of us realised what time it was when we woke up. My eyelids fluttered open and saw Namjoom stirring, only just coming out of his sleep, eyes still shut. He was so cute. The soft sunlight kissed his silky skin, making him look even more beautiful. Suddenly his eyes snapped open.

"Shit. What time is it?" His eyes met mine as I realised it was Monday morning. Fuck.

"Oh balls, are you late?" It was 11.30. Of course he was late. "Im sorry I shouldve set an alarm" I rushed to get up to get ready myself, but as I stood the whole room began to spin. I thought I was going to be sick.

"Oh no, Namjoo-" Nope. I couldnt hold it. I rushed to bathroom and bent down in front of the toilet, letting my body take over.

"Are you okay?" Namjoon called, his footsteps getting closer and closer to the bathroom.

"Dont come in!!" I screamed. I couldnt let him see me like this. It was embarrassing enough with no one watching.

I heard him sigh before shouting back "Im calling us both in sick."

"No! No, you go in, I'll be fine." I replied before wretching again.

"Not by the sounds of things in there. Im gonna make you some toast and grab you a glass of water, you gonna be alright?"

"Yea-" and I was gone again.

Half an hour had passed before I finally stopped throwing up. Namjoon had sat outside the door singing to me, trying to calm my nerves. He knows being sick is a huge phobia of mine. Id refused to let him in and yet he insisted on staying just outside, so he wouldnt be far if i needed him. It had been a while since Id had anyone care about me the way he did. It was nice.

"Here, eat some of this, it'll help settle your stomach" he said, scrambling to his feet as I opened the door.

"Thank you, Joonie" I tried my best to smile up at him, given the state I was in. I took the plate from his hand and went to starfish on the sofa. I was so unbelievably hot, my head was pounding and everything hurt.

"Get some sleep, I'll be here when you wake up" Namjoon knelt down in front of me to kiss my forehead and held my hand until I drifted off to sleep.

* * *

When I woke up it was dark outside and I was in my own bed. I expected Namjoon to have gone home by now but I rolled over to find him sound asleep in the space next to me. His golden hair fell to the side of his face, which was half buried in the pillow. Id never taken the time to properly admire just how gorgeous he was. He looked so peaceful. Staring at him a little longer  I wondered what he was dreaming about, and hoped it was making him happy. Cupping his face with my hand, I leant my forehead against his and sighed. My heart ached for him but I knew I wasnt ready, and perhaps never will be ready for anything. He was so kind, always putting everyone else above himself. He deserved someone who could give him everything he wants. Someone who'll always love him unconditionall, be a shoulder to cry on. Someone who could look at him and see their entire future. Someone who could make him feel the way he makes me feel. I wanted to be that person, I just.. didnt know if I could be.

It had also occured to me that I didnt really know a whole lot about him. He built so many walls up around himself, and so rarely let anybody in. Even me. I couldnt even tell you his favourite colour or what his favourite book is. It made me sad to think about it.

All I knew was that he made me happy. A happiness Ive only ever felt once before. And it scared me.

It wasnt long before Namjoon groaned slightly and began to stir and Id snatched my hand away and rolled back over to save myself any embarrassment. But in his half-asleep state he wrapped his arm around my waist and snuggled up against my back.

"I love you, Mia"