The Art of Playing Pretend (On Hold)

8. Danny

A/N dedicated to @Jessehoran2018. Thank you so much for your consistent voting.

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I bit my lip as I looked around the empty cemetery. There was barely anyone there. Lizzy and the others left about two hours ago. And I now realize how incredibly creepy that sounds.

Okay, so here's the thing. I don't want to socialize with them. But I do want to visit Lizzy's mom. She always helped me through problems and I just felt like it would be wrong if I didn't visit her. And I kind of owe her an explanation.

So half an hour after my family left our house, I went in my car and went to the cemetery. After that, I parked at a nearby drugstore and walked to the cemetery. I hid while I waited for them to be done.

Now is my time. I breathed in and walked over to her grave. I placed lilies right next to the many bouquets that were already placed there.

"Hi Aunt Grace," I said as I sat down next to her grave. "First of all, I want to say that I'm sorry I didn't come with everyone else. A lot has changed in these past few months."

I sighed. "Second of all, I'm sorry that I make Lizzy sad. I honestly don't mean to. But I just can't... I can't... I can't really handle talking to her now."

I leaned against the gray stone and looked up at the light blue sky. "She's so amazing, you know? And talking to her and being around her just makes me realize how... I'm not amazing. She's beautiful, smart, kind, everything I'm not."

I looked down at my feet. "And I just can't handle talking to anyone really, because somehow they are better than me, and it adds to this constant pain that I'm just barely handling. It's all too much."

I breathed in and out. "One day. One day I'll be okay enough to talk to everyone. But for now, I'll just stay back, and heal."

I closed my eyes. "Well, Aunt Grace, I have to go. I have to babysit my sister tonight."

I opened my eyes, stood up, and brushed off my jeans. "I really miss you." And I walked away, my chest feeling just a little bit lighter.

********

"Can we go out?" Mae begged.

"Mom and Dad said we can't," I said, flipping through channels.

Mae crossed her arms. "And when did you start listening to Mom and Dad?"

I turned off the TV. "You're right. Let's go."

"Yay! Thank you! I'll get my shoes." And she ran up stairs. I smiled and shook my head. She always knows how to break me.

Once we were in my car, Mae put in our dad's first album. I rolled my eyes. "Really, Mae?"

"C'mon, you know you love it."

"Whatever."

"So, where are we going?"

"Well, where do you want to go?"

"Let's go to McDonald's!"

I laughed. "Okay then."

********

"So, I saw your car when Mom, Dad, and I left the cemetery. Did you see Aunt Grace?" Mae said as she dipped her chicken nugget into the barbecue sauce.

I sighed, unwrapping my cheeseburger. "Yeah. I wouldn't miss something as important as that."

"Then why didn't you come with us?"

"Mae, you know why."

"Danny, you need to get out of this thing. It's not healthy. Before you know it you're going to end up alone because you don't have any friends."