Everything is Shitty

Chapter Eighteen - Its a Date

Stan
I know I should trust him! I know I should! It's just- so hard when he's so nice to Tweek! I get theyre best buddies now or whatever, but come on! I can see that Tweek likes him!!! The kid walks around with his heart on his sleeve like it's not even his!
I trudge downstairs and see Clyde in his underwear playing Detroit. Craig and Tweek aren't here. Craig said they were gonna go grab coffee and catch up a bit more. I'm nervous, but Craig is loyal... right? He sure seems that way... or at least... too cynical to do anything else with it...
    I grab the bottle of whiskey I bought a while back and sit beside Clyde, watching him play.
   "You worried about Craig?" Clyde asks
    "God is it obvious?" I respond, and Clyde laughs.
    "Craig isn't like that. I assure you. He's loyal to you, and I'm sure he likes you a lot." Clyde tries to make me feel better, but it's not working.
     "But deep down, there's always gonna be that part of him that still loves Tweek, he didn't let go for years after they broke up..."

Craig
   Tweek orders for both of us and I find a nice seat in the back, a booth. I've always preferred booths. They're more comfortable. Tweek comes back with the coffee and sits beside me rather than across. Like we used to when we were dating. We used to sit beside each other and put our feet up on the other side. Which I'll probably do again.
    "I got you a Caramel Macchiato. Just like you used to drink." He sets it in front of me and he leans against me. "I've missed you craig...  no matter what you say, or what you think is true... I've missed you so much..."
    That makes me blush. He remembers what I used to get... "I've been missing you too..." I mess with his hair. "I'm so happy that we get to be best friends."
    "Why... why just best friends..?"
    "I'm...I'm dating Stan... I have a boyfriend I love very much..."
    Tweek sighs heavily "I couldn't be happier for you... but I'm... honestly I'm jealous that it's not me..."
    "I wanted something new... I've been thinking of you and feeling lost my whole life... and Stan came along... he made me feel... alive... after feeling dead for... years... and Stan is... great... he's a really good boyfriend..." a fantastic lover...
    "But he could break your heart..."
    "You broke mine once too.."
    "Okay... okay we can be friends... I like that... I like being with you... and... that's how we'll stay." He seems let down...
    "Thank you..."
    "Can I just... have one last kiss? To... solidify that it's all over?"
    "Stan can never know..." I'll agree to a final kiss... I turn toward him and cup his cheek, this is wrong... but it's finalizing everything... I lean in and peck his lips, going to pull away immediately after, but he pulls me in and kisses me deeper. I pull back as soon as he allows and lean forward. I feel guilty, like a bad boyfriend because of all of this... I kissed someone that isn't my boyfriend...
    "Stan doesn't know." Tweek says as he leans against me.
    After a bit of talking, we finish the coffee and go home. We drove in the same car, it was mine, so I drive us home. We walk up the stairs together and as soon as we get to the apartment I unlock it and hold the door for him, Stan looks over and smiles as soon as he sees my face, and I smile lightly back as I take off my shoes and go over to sit in his lap. He puts an arm around me and pecks my cheek.
    "How was it, babe?" He asks, and I shrug
    "Any old get together, just talking and drinking coffee." I cuddle up against him. That sounds nice to do right now. 
   "I've just been sitting here watching Clyde suck at video games." Stan says, and I laugh.
   "I know he does." I rub my hands all over Stan's chest.
"Woah, you feeling a little handsy?" He asks, and I chuckle.
    "I like how your body feels..." I tell him, and I can see his face get red, I catch a glimpse of tweek, who is frowning at this whole thing.
    I just want to make everybody happy... why can't I do that? I gave Tweek a kiss what more does he want from me? Why can't I make myself happy without making other people upset at the decisions I've made?
   My hand trails up to cup Stan's cheek and turn his head toward mine so I can kiss him. Trying to get the taste and the guilt of Tweek off my lips...
    When we part he smiles lightly at me, I don't smile back, I just cuddle into him.
    I'm so sorry....