Everything is Shitty

Chapter Five - Bedroom 'Fun'

Craig
He looks around my room. Snoops in it, id say, before he takes a seat on my bed. That's when I walk in and shut the door, standing with crossed arms until Nova comes by and stretches her paws up my leg. That's when I pick her up and begin petting her.
"Oh that's an adorable kitty!" Stan exclaims, which makes me smile a little bit.
"This is Nova." I introduce, learning down and letting her crawl on Stan's lap. She's the cuddliest cat I've ever met. I love her.
   "Hi Nova!" He exclaims so happily. How can someone so stupid be so adorable at times? No. No don't think that. He's not. At all. He's big and manly and intimidating! God I'm so bad at lying.
   "I forgot about your thing for animals." I say as I sit next to him. Nova purring in his lap "I think she likes you..." I sigh contently. He's not... that bad.
Once Nova jumps off him and goes to her spot on my bed, he looks at me and takes my hand. His touch is kinda... comfortable... I squeeze his hand and look at him.
"Oh, so you want touches now?" Stan asks and I roll my eyes
"Not if you're gonna be a dick about it." I yank my hand from his. He whimpers and tries to grab my hand again.
    "Gimme!" He whines
    "You gonna stop being a dick?" I ask, and he nods. So I take his hand and he squeezes it, then puts his head on my shoulder.
    My heart feels funny. So does my stomach, and I don't know why. He looks up and kisses my cheek, but so close to where he catches the corner of my mouth. I sigh. I want him to kiss me again. I /want/ that.
    But I don't.
    I'm not gonna let myself want it. He's gonna go. I won't get him back. I have to get Tweek back... my heart is still his. I don't care if he's married or not... I don't care how long it has been...
     But this just seems better.
     I turn my head toward him and my hand very shakily and hesitantly goes up to his chest. It just rests there as he and I make eye contact. At first I see admiration, then it slips into fear as he gets up and looks around, going to the window and opening it. Vomiting out of it.
    "Am I that gross?" I ask as I sigh and crawl under my sheets. He spits and looks back at me.
   "You're the furthest thing from." He says as he sits back down and puts a hand on my hip.  That is terribly close to my ass and he needs to knock it off.
    "Vomiting really shows that." I roll my eyes
    "I vomited on Wendy all the time. It's just because I... well... I really like you..." He says, and I sigh. Sitting back up
    "There's mouthwash in the bathroom." He instantly gets up and comes back seconds later. He straddles me, which is strange, and pins me down to the bed.
    "Is this what you thought I meant?" I ask
    "No I just felt like taking it a step further." He looks at my body "I've never had gay sex before."
    Is that what he thinks is gonna happen!? "I've never had sex, at all." I respond with, and he smirks
    "Maybe we should see what it's like." He purrs seductively before leaning down and kissing me. I return it with hesitance before pulling away.
    "Stan... I can't... do that..." I swallow, it's the first emotion I've showed him and it's fear. He looks worried and instantly moves off me.
    "I'm sorry Craig, I shouldn't push it... we can just lay for a bit... and I'll go home if you want." He seems embarrassed. Of course he is.
    "You... can stay tonight..." I tell him as I turn to my side, he comes behind me and puts an arm around me.,
    "Is this okay?" He asks. Oh, now he asks after I've shown him fear?
   "It's fine... comfortable..." I answer, and he sighs. I lay there like that. Even after he's deep asleep. It doesn't take him too long, I've noticed. It takes me awhile to do that. Sleeping is hard. I'm probably an insomniac, but I'm not a little bitch so I'm not gonna complain about my lack of sleep. I'm just gonna deal with it.
    "Thank you.." I say to the unconscious Stan.
I don't even know what I'm thanking him for.