Love of a Sinner

Ch 4 - Trapped

Warnings: mental torment, self-harm

- Huf huf...

Jiwook run and run, trying helplessly to get away of that pitchy black darkness, that wanted to tangle itself around him and swallow him entirely. Countless sharp limbs were following him closely, that if he'd stop just for a second he'd be sliced in thousand pieces right away. He run and run, but he didn't even know where he was heading. In front, at the back, at the sides - wherever he was looking, there was just cold darkness. It was suffocating.

- Huf huf...

He was drenched in sweat and was out of breath. His entire body was on the verge to give up, but he still held into it, in his last strengths. He was fighting with all his being to overcome that power, to somehow get away from it. However his willpower wasn't enough. He tripped on his own foot and was encircled right that second by the moving darkness.

- No! No! Let go of me!...

He tried to break free from it but it was in vain. He got pinned by those cold limbs unable to move.

- Go away! No! No!

His voice broke in helpless screams, panic taking over his mind and making his heart nearly explode from fear. The limbs like sharp thorns stung him continuously, fast, one after another, with such great power that Jiwook lost his voice screaming in pain. It felt like knives were cutting through his flesh and even his bones over and over again, making an unbearable crunching sound. And the worse of it, Jiwook could hear it. With each second his sanity was breaking drastically, the pain, amplified now to an inhuman degree, was taking over his entire body and mind. He felt like he was dying again and again, a thousand times, for God knows how long.

Suddenly the darkness shaped in form of a human. Someone he knew. His brother.

- You...killed me.

His heart nearly stopped.

- You killed me.

As to ensure that Jiwook heard it, the shadow form which looked like his brother repeated the same words over and over again.

- No! It's not true! You... you are alive. You didn't die. I didn't ... kill you, cried out in reply Jiwook, recovering a faint piece of his sanity back.

- You killed me. You killed me. You killed me.

- No! No! You're alive!, shouted Jiwook gradually louder and louder, but it couldn't overcome the shadow's voice. It was multiplied and sounded in echoes, like there were thousand of shadows not just one.

Then, suddenly he saw his brother in front of him, covered entirely in blood, his own hands were drenched in that dark red liquid, cold like ice and yet burning his skin at the same time.

- No! It's not me. I didn't! I didn't!

Now Jiwook was slowly drowning in a sea of cold blood, having no way to escape. His screams were dissolving in the heavy smoky air, not reaching anyone.

- It wasn't me! You... on your own...

As if to answer his statement the shadow reappeared in front of him, immense drops of blood dropping down from his body.

Jiwook looked intently only to find that this time it wasn't his brother there. It was him. A body looking breathless, with the same bluish hair like his, same clothes, same eyes, wearing his face, like he saw himself in mirror, but the reflection didn't follow his movements, instead it drowned in blood. It was dead. He was dead.

That moment he realized it was him there dead and unmoving, not his brother, nor someone else but him - Han Jiwook, his mind turned completely blank. His body fell heavily on his knees and hanged down, like all his soul got drained out of him.