My Journey with Christianity

Chapter 3: The Shift Begins, Things Start Getting Clearer

In the previous chapter, I confronted a profound question that had been weighing on my mind: If the Christian God was as real as believers claimed, why wasn't it evident to Atheists, many of whom were smart, rational, and authentic individuals? This question led me down a path of deep introspection and discovery.

As I delved further into my exploration, I began to discern a distortion of truth within certain Christian teachings. It became increasingly clear to me that the fundamental Christian paradigm was narrow and limiting in its understanding of the divine.

In a dream that would prove to be an awakening, I encountered Peter, one of Jesus' disciples. This Peter was unlike the figure I had read about in the Bible; he exuded kindness, understanding, and a profound depth. He spoke passionately about Christ, leaving me captivated by his words. But what struck me most was his character. Peter, in this dream, was genuinely a remarkable person, and I felt grateful for the opportunity to meet him.

In this dream, I ventured downstairs from an attic and stumbled upon a church that resembled many I had seen before. Yet, something felt amiss. I sensed anger and distress, particularly among the ministers, as if a grave transgression had occurred. It soon became evident that they were searching for someone they believed had committed a serious offense: Peter.

I was shocked and puzzled, but I understood the gravity of the situation. These individuals were angry with Peter for the things he had been saying. Although I couldn't recall his specific words, I was struck by the essence of his character. We were hiding in the attic to protect him from those who wished him harm.

Upon waking from this dream, its meaning became clear to me. I realized that what many people now believed to be the gospel was not necessarily aligned with the beliefs of the disciples like Peter. The dream illuminated the vast chasm between the teachings of the early followers of Christ and the dogma that had evolved over the centuries.

I came to understand that if these disciples were to walk among us today, they might be accused of being false teachers and distorting the gospel. This revelation saddened me, but it also ignited a desire to work towards positive change.

Despite the clarity provided by the dream, I still had questions. I grappled with the tension between my personal experiences with Jesus, which portrayed a loving and inclusive figure, and the exclusive teachings of fundamental Christianity.

I had grown up in a Christian background, attending Sunday school for 18 years, and had adopted certain beliefs. However, my experiences with Jesus did not align with the portrayal of a judgmental and exclusive deity.

My understanding of Jesus was of a gracious and loving being who embraced everyone, regardless of their past actions. He healed, restored, and made people feel comfortable in his presence. I believed in his inclusivity rather than exclusivity and saw him as the source of our existence and wisdom.

My beliefs were further affirmed by stories such as the one about a missionary sharing the gospel with a Buddhist monk. The monk, upon hearing the story of Jesus, broke into tears and revealed that he already knew Jesus in his heart. He resonated with the essence of Jesus, even before learning his name or the details of his life. This story brought me deep joy and peace.

It reminded me of Paul's words in Acts 17 when he addressed pagans, emphasizing that we live, move, and have our being in God. Paul quoted their own poets, affirming that we are all God's offspring. This revelation transcended religious boundaries and reinforced the idea that God is accessible to all.

I found great comfort in messages like these, which validated my personal experiences despite conflicting beliefs within my Christian community. It confirmed that God is not limited to one religion or understanding and that the divine presence is far more expansive and cosmic than traditional Christian teachings suggest.

In my personal journey, I realized that fundamental Christianity often propagated the idea of separation from God as a natural state, something we inherit. My experiences, on the other hand, affirmed the inherent oneness with the divine. We only experience the illusion of separation due to the limitations of our minds.

This realization led me to a biblical passage (Colossians 1:21) that echoed my sentiments. Fundamental Christianity taught that "non-believers" or the "lost" were separated from God, outside of His love and not His children. In contrast, my understanding was that every individual is already in God, and we are all His children, regardless of our beliefs or actions.

What I came to understand allowed us to experience a truth that was already real, a subjective experience in an objective reality. At this very moment, everyone is accepted by God, belonging to Him by nature. This truth was what I had experienced, seen, felt, and was compelled to share. It was an intuitive knowing that religion had distorted but was, in essence, a universal and timeless reality.