[completed ] Choi San was too busy breaking everyone else's heart, to keep an eye on his own. And when a player gets played, things get messy...
And possibly deadly.
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「 nursery rhymes I'm singing my dreams I'm lost in the woods and you're baring your teeth 」
♫ the veronicas; lolita
✩ h o n g j o o n g ✩
The small glow from the burning end of a cigarette, was the only form of light in the dark apartment, while Hongjoong sat on the windowsill - glancing over the city outside. A couple of crumbled up dollar bills were lying on the couch, next to the window, where he had thrown them after coming home earlier that same night.
Exhaling the smoke, a long sigh followed. His body still felt sweaty and gross, even after a long shower. After work, he had went to a random bar and found the first and best, smug-looking businessman, and let that stranger fuck him in a nearby hotel - only in hopes of emptying his mind.
But it result had been the opposite, and Hongjoong felt even worse than before.
He had never felt bad about a one-night stand, nor about stealing whatever he could from those suit-wearing pigs, but tonight was different.
The things Seonghwa had told him were feasting on his every thought, spreading doubt in them, and not only about San - but about himself. Hell, Hongjoong knew from the start that San was a devious, manipulating human being, but the last night they spent together had been nice.
Hongjoong scoffed at his own thought. Nice? No, it had been wonderful, why was he even trying to lie to himself like this? Maybe, because it was hard to admit that he had made a mistake, by letting his guards down just a bit, and let all those sweet words and actions actually affect him.
Sleeping around with strangers he didn't give two shits about, didn't feel good anymore, not even when the sex was decent. Instead he found himself craving for something he had hoped he'd never need in his life. Intimacy.
While he had had it, in its own twisted way, with Yeosang - it still wasn't the same. With Yeosang it had been driven mostly by the thrill of the uncertainty, and the fascination with such beauty. The want, for something he deep down knew he could never have.
"Hey... You're still awake?" Mingi's voice suddenly asked, from the door to the narrow hallway.
Hongjoong nodded from his spot, fiddling with his pack of cigarettes to light up one more, while listening to the sound of Mingi hanging his coat and kicking his shoes off. The taller then walked into the dark living room, and jumped up to sit next to Hongjoong on the windowsill.
"Were you with Seonghwa again?" Hongjoong asked, passing a cigarette over to Mingi.
"No..." the taller mumbled, fighting with the almost empty lighter. "Had to stay longer at work... We had a... Situation..."
The way Mingi turned his head to look out the window, while smoke was flowing from his lips, told Hongjoong he shouldn't ask any questions. So he chose to stay silent, but he had an idea of what had happened.
