Terrified

Gentle Love

Amy wanted so desperately to leave Rumlow in the dust of the past and make a future with Bucky. Her fears of seeing Rumlow in place of Bucky in the middle of love making was her greatest fear. Rumlow was in her nightmares, she didn't want him to replace Bucky's face whenever she looked at him. She decided as Bucky was clearing away the last of the dishes in the kitchen that she was going to be bold and just go for it.

"I want you to make love to me," Amy's voice was heard across the lonely kitchen that harbored just Bucky and her. Bucky's head shot up, the request coming out of nowhere. It had been a few months since she had been checked by the good Doctor and he had given her the all clear a month ago, but this was still incredibly sudden. Bucky blinked a few times, trying to clear his mind thinking that he didn't actually just hear what he just heard.

"Wh-what?" he stuttered.

"I want you to make love to me," Amy repeated exactly as before but more matter-of-factly this time. Bucky dried his hands with the towel to the right of him as he thought.

"Are you sure?" he asked her. She nodded.

"I want to leave Brock behind. I don't want to feel his arms on me anymore. I don't want to feel him inside me anymore." She walked up to him, barely touching his left arm before gripping it tightly and looking into his eyes, "I want you to erase him from my body, from my mind." Bucky clenched his jaw thinking about all the things that Rumlow had done to her and thinking about how much this meant to her. She unbuttoned the dress she was wearing and let it drop to her feet. She was wearing nothing but blue lace underwear and a matching bra. She looked back up at him, her innocent doe eyes quietly asking him to make her his, make her belong to him. Bucky squared his shoulders, licked his lips, then picked her up and carried her to his room, kissing her lips, neck and shoulder as he did.

Bucky laid her down on his bed, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her passionately. He swept his tongue along her bottom lip and she opened her mouth to him. His hand ran up the side of her body and he gently grasped her breast in his left hand, kneading it carefully. Amy began to feel the panic rise in her chest but she pushed it back down again, not wanting to ruin the moment. Bucky continued to explore her body, now reaching his hand down to her most intimate region. He pulled her panties to one side and inserted his metal finger inside her with ease. The panic was beginning to rise again and Bucky lowered his head to her neck, nipping and kissing it. He came back up, resting on his arm and looked in her and eyes and all she saw was Rumlow. She pushed herself away from him, her hair falling a little in front of her face as she sat up slightly.

"What happened?" Bucky whispered seeing her cover her mouth in fear. She then tried to cover her body in shame, "I saw him. It wasn't you touching me. It was him. He's never going to leave." She started to cry and Bucky pulled her back into his arms, laying her back down and pulled the blanket up and over her shoulders to make her feel safer.

"I knew Rumlow," Bucky said with no emotion in his voice. Amy looked up at him.

"What?"

"Rumlow. I knew him. When I was in Hydra." Bucky pushed the hair out of her eyes, letting her settle into his arms more before he continued. "He was my last handler in Hydra."

"Brock was part of Hydra?" Amy's voice shook as she realized that there must have been a reason for Rumlow to want a boy and not a girl for a baby, knowing what Hydra was.

"Yeah. He was a commander in Hydra," Bucky pulled her in closer, "I used to have nightmares about him coming to take me back to Hydra. I still do sometimes. Hell, I can still feel his hands on me from time to time. But I know I'm stronger than he is and I know I can take him down if I had to." Amy looked up at Bucky understanding him better now.

"I'm not strong enough to fight him Bucky," she said.

"I'll teach you, I'll protect you, I'll lay down my life for you if I have to," Bucky replied, "I love you, Amy. I'm never gonna let him take you from me. I'll go back to Hydra and be their puppet before I see anyone hurt you ever again." Bucky leaned down to kiss her and that kiss empowered her enough to continue all the way through her previous intentions for the night.

From that point on, Amy became very open about being affectionate towards Bucky in public. She would openly tell him she loved him and would kiss him passionately not caring who was looking. She was bold enough to be more sexual with him and entice him to the bed. Bucky loved it, he loved how strong she was becoming. Until she got sick. It seemed so much like a flu at first but Amy knew these symptoms. Low energy, sick into the afternoon, vomiting, not sleeping, odd cravings. She took the test to see if it was actually true. As she looked at the stick she realized that it was.

Amy was pregnant.