Terrified

Rebecca

5 years later

"Hi Julia!" Amy called to her friend who was coming with her daughter, Sammy, for a play date with Rebecca, Amy's daughter. She never attempted to run back to Bucky, she always assumed that she would be rejected or worse, beaten by him if she ever returned. She chose instead, to raise Rebecca in a secluded area in a lake house in the woods. There was a house that was to the right of them that had been vacant for years, a big, grand lake house but no one had bothered to buy it as it was far to expensive. Rebecca looked more and more like her father every day. She had gotten his beautiful brown hair and elegant cheek bones but she had Amy's brown eyes. And ever since her fall from that tree she insisted on climbing on her fifth birthday just six months ago, she was looking even more like him. Her left arm had broken in two places and required surgery to fix. The scar that ran down her forearm, reminded Amy of Bucky even more. 

As Amy and Julia watched their daughters play together on the pier by the lake, Julia tried again to get Amy to agree to a date that she was setting up.

"He's not so tall, but he's good looking," Julia tried to half assed convince Amy, "he makes good money and -" Amy put her hand up to stop her friend from continuing.

"Please stop," Amy said lowly, "I'm not interested. I never have been interested and I'm never going be interested. So please just stop trying to get me to go on a date with this guy and that guy."

"It's not right for Rebecca to grow up without a dad, a child needs their dad." Julia was a very traditional woman, trying to marry off every un-matched friend, acquaintance and stranger she met.

"I'm raising her just fine on my own thank you," Amy retorted.

"You never told me what happened to you and her dad though." Amy was about to get up and go in the house, making up some excuse that she needed to get something on the stove but Julie grabbed her arm from across the table, stopping her, "Nuh-uh, you're not walking out on me this time." Amy sat back down slowly, knowing that she was going to have to talk about Bucky for the first time in a long time. "Now listen," Julie continued, "You've been my friend for two years now and I still don't know what happened between you and her dad. All you've ever told me is that he isn't in the picture and anytime I've ever tried to press you further on it, you always have an excuse to not talk about it. You always have to put something on the stove, or you have to get something from the attic. Now I'm done with the excuses, you need to tell me what happened between you and her dad."

Amy released a heavy sigh and steadied herself before telling Julie about Rumlow and what happened with her first daughter. She told Julie everything she could about Bucky without telling her who he was or what he did. All she told her was that Rebecca's dad had a troubled past and that she let her fear get to her even though Bucky did everything he could to keep her safe.

"It sounds to me like her dad would have kept both of you safe," Julie concluded.

"He would have, I know that now."

"So why not go back to him?"

"He wouldn't take me back now. By the time I had healed from my past it had been two years and I couldn't just show up on his doorstep with a child on my hip like, 'hey here I am, here's your daughter, take care of us.' He'd throw us both out. Plus I don't know if he has a family of his own now. I'm not gonna intrude on his life just because I got right in the head again." Julie sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to change her mind on this, not today.

"Does Rebecca know? About her dad?"

"She knows that I ran from her dad because I was scared because of another man. She doesn't know who he is though." Amy answered.

"Well, if you ever do decide to go back to him, let me know. I'll drive you there myself." Julie stood and tapped her friend on her shoulder before she called her daughter to her, telling her that it was time for them to go.

"Hey mommy!" Rebecca called out, "Look! There's a truck!" All of them turned their heads to see a moving truck pulling up to the vacant lake house next door. She could have sworn she saw a glint of silver on the left side of one of the men that got out of the U-Haul on the passenger side but she quickly tossed that thought away.

Amy thought that night about what Julie and said to her and thought about how she was right, that Bucky would have most likely accepted her with open arms. He would most definitely accept his daughter without hesitation. But what if he had changed? What if her leaving him without explanation had made him turn bitter? What if he did hate her? What if he had a family now? She couldn't intrude on that. She turned over and cried herself to sleep, wishing that he could just pass her by and he could chose to continue walking or open his arms to her.