Terrified

Metal

Bucky sat in the living area of the compound, waiting for Strange to come out and tell him how everything went. It was a hour later when the Doc came in looking worn out.

"Hey, is Amy okay? Is the baby okay?" Bucky fired off in a hushed tone as he bolted towards the Doctor.

"The baby is healthy and it's a girl," Strange stated and Bucky burst into a smile, receiving slaps on the back from Steve and Sam. Strange pinched the bridge of his nose, drawing in a breath and trying to figure out how to tell Bucky the next part. Bucky saw that the Doc was looking distressed and he asked, "What is it? Is Amy okay?" Strange took another deep breath before he stated poignantly, "Bucky, she's been through a lot, as you know," Bucky's smile was beginning to falter, "with her first pregnancy ending the way it did with the death of her infant at the hands of Rumlow -"

"Doc," Bucky interrupted and Strange sighed once more.

"I'm sorry Bucky, she doesn't want you anywhere near the baby." Bucky's heart stopped, then broke, then shattered.

"Wh-what?" he spat, "That's my daughter, I want to see my daughter!" Bucky took a step, attempting to pass Strange but the doc put his hand up, halting Bucky's actions.

"Barnes, think about what she's been through. This is the same exact thing that happened the last time. She went into labor early and she realized only after the birth that she was having a girl. She most likely fears that you are going to react to having a daughter in the same manner that Rumlow did. She's a scared, new mother and she's trying to protect her baby girl." Bucky listened then slowed his ragged breathing, thinking over everything she's been through. He decided quickly that he would be patient even thought it broke his heart and he nodded in understanding to what Strange had said. The doctor left to look after his patient and Bucky sat on one of the couches in the living room and put his hands in his face.

"Buck are you okay?" Steve asked as he sat next to Bucky.

"After everything, she still doesn't trust me." All Steve could do was put an arm around his brother and let Bucky's head rest on Steve's shoulder while quiet tears left Bucky's eyes.

Later that night Bucky thought if he could just sneak into the room the baby was in so he could at least see what his little girl looked like, that would hold him over enough until Amy decided that she could trust Bucky with their daughter. Quickly and quietly, while most of the compound was asleep, Bucky made his way to the room in the medical bay. He reached the room that both Amy and his daughter were asleep in and opened the door so quietly you wouldn't know a door had been open unless you were standing right there watching. He saw his tiny child in her bassinet next to Amy's bed and he made his way over. When he finally looked over the edge of the bassinet, he was overcome with emotion but he swallowed it down as hard as he could so as to not wake anyone. He reached his flesh hand in to touch her squishy cheeks and she nuzzled into his touch. Finally, he couldn't resist anymore and he reached in with both hands to lift her out of her little bed. She made no noise as he lifted her up, his metal hand cradling her little round head carefully, to kiss her tiny, button nose. He whispered "I love you so much my little one. My sweet girl. I swear I will protect you and so will your mommy." She smiled in her sleep at the sound of her father's voice and Bucky let a silent tear slip from his eye as he lifted her one more time to give her a series of kisses on her forehead.

"Put her down!" Amy nearly screamed in anger and fear, causing Bucky and the baby to jump (though the tiny child didn't wake up). Bucky looked at Amy and saw fear in her eyes. Bucky tried to soothe her.

"Look, she's okay," Bucky said with a gentle smile on his face quietly so as to not wake his little girl, "She's sleeping, she's okay."

"Give her to me!" Amy said, her voice raising slightly teetering on a level that was sure to wake the infant with her arms outstretched towards her daughter.

"But she's okay, she's sleeping, she likes me," Bucky tried again but Amy became more desperate with her hands stretching further.

"GIVE ME MY DAUGHTER!" Amy cried and Bucky quickly handed the baby off to her as the baby woke up in tears, not understanding what the loud noises were. Bucky's eyes clouded over in sadness as the realization that she truly did not trust him with their baby girl was further clear when she ordered him to leave the room, giving him no time to say a proper goodbye to his little girl.

Bucky was sitting in the living room again, his head in his hands when Steve walked up to him, patting him on the shoulder gently.

"She's terrified of me," Bucky whispered.

"Come on, she's not scared of you," Steve tried to reassure.

"Steve, you didn't see the way she looked at me." Bucky looked down at his left arm, "She looked at me as if I were a monster trying to hurt her baby. She was terrified, Steve." Bucky began crying into his hands and Steve pulled him in for a hug, no words coming to his mind of what to say in order to comfort his friend.

A few days later, Bucky decided to try going in to hold his baby girl again. Amy was sitting up, holding their tiny child in her arms, probably having just finished feeding her. Amy looked up at Bucky and the fear came back in her eyes almost immediately. He slowly stepped forward, walking towards her, trying his best to seem as small and as non-threatening as possible.

"Hi, doll," Bucky said quietly, not wanting to startle her and not knowing if their baby girl was asleep or not, "how is she? Is she okay?" Amy nodded her head but didn't speak. Bucky sat slowly on the edge of the bed, "Can I hold her?" Amy looked up at Doctor Strange who was now standing at the foot of her bed and Strange nodded with a small, comforting smile. She hesitated for a long while before handing their baby off to Bucky. He gently and carefully took the tiny child from Amy's arms and held her in his. Amy watched Bucky's hands like a hawk so much that she didn't even notice that their bitty baby girl was completely at peace in his arms.

Bucky savored every millisecond holding his daughter in his arms. He positioned his daughter so her bitty toes touched his chest, placing his right arm and hand under her back and neck and his metal hand wrapped around to support her wobbly head. Panic set in in Amy's mind as she looked at Bucky's powerful metal hand wrapped around her innocent daughter's skull. She remembered back to the time that he had accidentally crushed the kitchen counter under his hand. Then Bucky looked at her with a smile and all Amy could see was Rumlow's face.

"Give her back to me," Amy said, trying desperately to mask the fear in her voice, "I'll take her now." Bucky couldn't mask the hurt but he tried to smile.

"Honey, look," he said, "she's happy, she's - she's okay, she's safe."

"Give her back to me," Amy's voice was shaky now but she was still trying to hide the fear in her voice. Bucky nodded sadly, kissing his daughter's forehead and handed her carefully back to Amy. "Please, please leave," she said. He again nodded and left the room but not before looking at his little girl and Amy one more time.

Amy decided that she wasn't going to risk her daughter dying in front of her again. That night, while the compound was asleep, Amy disabled the gps in one of Stark's cars, took her newborn baby in her arms and drove away from her home. She left no note, only packed what she absolutely needed and just left. The reminders of her past with Rumlow haunting her and making her forget that Bucky was probably the only man on this Earth that would lay down his life for both her and their baby and that the safest place on the Earth was at the compound that she was leaving.