Noah & Navid

Chapter 21- He's Gone

"I didn't want upset you until I know for sure, my baby. My parents just get approval today to travel. It is how my country works. I thought was best to no say a thing until I know it happen for sure," Navid said as he stared at me from across the bed with sad eyes.

He'd just pulled a giant suitcase out of the closet and was throwing boxers and socks into it.

"You knew about this... You knew you'd have to leave tomorrow and... you just let me go on thinking you'd be here. We made Christmas plans! We bought a tree! How can you just leave me here?" My heart was pounding as tears rolled down my cheek.

Navid moved towards me to try and wipe them away, but I jumped off the bed and went into the bathroom.

I closed the door behind me and turned the little lock. I reached for my pocket, but realized he had my phone. He had taken it at dinner since he said I spent too much time on it when we were together. 

He had been upset the last few days. I thought it was because he had left one class off his degree plan and so he couldn't graduate until the spring, but now I guess it was him dealing with the uncertainty of leaving me.

"Baby," Navid said with a sigh when he tried to turn the door handle and realized it was locked. "This is not real lock, you know.... It pop open if you turn handle back and forth quickly."

He demonstrated and the door opened an inch. He waited, not wanting to anger me more.

"Please open to me, baby. I need make sure you aren't hurting yourself," he said in that calm, deep voice like I was the crazy one.

He wanted to see that I wasn't digging my fingernails into the palms of my hands. It was something I did when anxiety won out. I wasn't. I hadn't done that in a long time, but he always worried.

I opened the door to look at him, and he took my hands and opened them. I started to cry again. "Please don't leave me," I whispered.

He raised each of my hands to his lips and kissed my palms. I put them to his cheek as he stared into me with shame.

"I don't want to go. You know that I don't! Last thing ever I want is leave you. It is only for ten days. I promise I shall be here to celebrate Christmas with you. I will make sure you have a gift to open every day that I am gone. Either Aram or your father will stay here with you each night so you will never be alone. I have not seen my family in so long and is hard for them to leave Iran to come see me," Navid said.

"I cannot return to my family in Iran or even to my home there. I nearly finish with degree here and have valuable skills my country need. Also I speak English now. They maybe would not let me out to return to you. I can't even see my land, Noah. If so I might never again see my boy. I meet my family in Italy where we can all be together," Navid explained and finished with a sigh.

"But you're getting on an airplane in 12 hours and you just tell me this at bedtime while you're packing and I'm supposed to be ok with it. You never include me in anything! I'm just the house pet you're going to leave with a dog-sitter for ten days while you run off to Europe to see your family. I'm a person, Navid not a dog!" I was shaking.

I pushed against his chest like I wanted to punch it, but he just put his arms around me and pulled me into him.

"I honestly didn't think my parents would get the travel visa to leave Iran. It was at last minute that the government approved it. The country is like that. You make plans but don't know if you can do them. I thought it was best to not upset you when was not for sure to happen. I wish I could bring you with me. I want so much to spend my first Christmas with you," Navid said as he rubbed my back and kissed my hair.