„I can't do this anymore. I can't.. I can't.." his voice broke down at the end. Cole's sitting in the bathroom. Breathing heavily.
- a few hours earlier -
Cole suffers from depression and anxiety. But Lili has always been the one helping him get through it and being there for him. He was incredibly grateful for her. He doesn't know what he would do without her.
But the last few days Cole started to feel worse. Way worse. He thought about everything related to his woman. What if he isn't good enough? She could easily find another man way better than him. He felt like he doesn't deserve such a beautiful woman like Lili.
Lili is so happy lately and Cole doesn't wanna ruin it. So as soon as Lili's with him he behaves normally even though he's broken inside. He just wants her to be happy and she's not if she realises how terrible Cole feels.
He knew that Lili is too good for him so he tried to make her at least feel good.
They were currently cuddling on the couch when Lili looked at him smiling.
„What?" Cole asked curiously. „Nothing.. it's just.. I'm so happy that you're so happy lately." she smiled resting her head on his chest. He fake smiled back at her but she didn't notice.
„Is it okay if I'm gonna go on a party tonight with mads, cami and vanessa?" She asked before kissing his cheek. That's when Cole froze inside. She could easily find another guy to hook up with. Any guy who's way better for her than he is.
But he nodded. „Of course.." he replied smiling slightly. He knew that his anxiety will act up strongly, but he wants the best for her and he wants to see her happy. That's why he agreed.
But the thoughts didn't get out of his mind. He couldn't think about anything else. He always had this picture in his mind of Lili kissing someone else. But he's not good enough. He just knows it. That's why she's most likely gonna do it.
Lili was wearing a beautiful red dress making her look breathtaking. So many better man would love to date her.. but she has Cole.. a man that's not good enough for this beautiful woman. He sighed. It would be better for her if he wasn't here anymore.
„Okay, I gotta go. Have fun watching your movie, love." she said and kissed Cole quickly on the lips.
„Bye! I love you!" she exclaimed while walking out of the door. Cole just sat there for a few minutes but what it felt like hours. He thought about her a lot. About how he's not sufficient to Lili. He tried to ignore these thoughts but it simply wasn't possible.
