𝙂𝙧𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙮𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙎𝙝𝙞𝙛𝙩 || 𝙏𝙖𝙚𝙠𝙤𝙤𝙠

epilogue; daybreak

There are many things in his life, that Jeongguk has long accepted, he will never be able to understand.

He'll never understand why his parents always fought at night, but pretended it never happened the next morning. Or why his older brother ran away from home when he was only thirteen, and never came back.

He'll never understand why one of his friends in high school, Minjae, if his memory serves him right, seemingly seized to exist after he came out as gay. 

Jeongguk and his other friends has showed him their utmost support and were very proud of him. They started getting worried when Minjae didn't come to school for more than two weeks. Then a few days later their teacher announced in class that Minjae had passed away almost a week ago. 

To this day, Jeongguk doesn't know what actually happened to his friend.

A few more things to add to the extensive list is how Hoseok got and is able to keep the damn car wash job. And how Namjoon and Sooyoung are still together despite so many arguments and differences between them. 

Or why, sometimes, when he thinks Jeongguk isn't looking, Taehyung's eyes look so melancholic and longing. For what? Jeongguk doesn't think he'll be able to understand. But that doesn't mean he isn't willing to try. 

Currently, the two are sat side by side on a slab of concrete next to the gas pumps. It's around 4 a.m. It's exceptionally quiet, as it always is at this time of the morning. Three hours remain 'til their shift ends. 

It's been eight months since Jeongguk has worked at the station. He thinks it's safe to say that well, he really likes this job. 

Jeongguk leans back against Taehyung, who accommodates him easily. "Hey, Tae?" The older hums to let him know he's listening, he always listens. "I have a weird question I wanna ask you. But, I don't know if I should."

He hears Taehyung sigh. "There are no weird questions, Jeongguk."

Jeongguk worries his bottom lip between his teeth for a moment before exhaling. "If I were to ask you to describe me as a feeling, what would you say?," he asks slowly, in a quiet voice.

Taehyung's quiet for a minute. Jeongguk waits with bated breath, beginning to regret voicing his question. 

"Hm..," begins the older. "I think, Guk, you're the feeling I get when I finally lay down in bed after a long, tiring day. Or, the feeling I get when I see the moon rise every night. It never gets old."

Jeongguk looks up Taehyung only to find him already looking at him. "Good enough answer for you, moonboy?," he asks with a smile. 

Jeongguk grins back. "You and your never-ending nicknames for me. But yeah, I liked it."

Taehyung hooks his chin over his head. "What about me?"

Jeongguk hums contemplatively. The blue hour has already begun. The horizon a true blue shade. 

"You're the feeling I get when I feel like I'm forgetting something, but I can't remember what. It's right on the tip of my tongue, but I just can't put a name to it."

"Well, is that a good thing or a bad thing?," Taehyung asks. 

Jeongguk glances down at the older's hand where it's resting beside his leg, a scar peeking out from underneath the cuff of his jacket. 

Jeongguk shrugs. "I don't know. Maybe both," he answers, looking away. 

"Maybe both," Taehyung repeats in a murmur. Silence falls between the two after that. 

There are many things in his life, that Jeongguk has long accepted, he will never be able to understand. Maybe Kim Taehyung as a whole is one of them.

Jeongguk doesn't realize he's been zoned out until Taehyung's voice cuts through his haze. "The sunrise. Always so gorgeous, isn't it?"

Jeongguk gazes up at the sky. The dawn's settling in shades of yellow, orange and pink. The colors spread in the sky as if someone had knocked over cans of paint, ultimately resulting in a masterpiece. 

No matter how many times Jeongguk witnesses this scene, it never fails to take his breath away. 

Jeongguk closes his eyes with a small, calm smile on his lips. He lets out a deep breath, and says,

"It feels like you, Taehyung."

-

nothing like writing about sunrises in the middle of the night :))

that moment when the epilogue is better than the whole story 😂

but seriously this short piece of writing is very close to my heart and i hope reading it was enjoyable to you <33

thank you to everyone who read it, means a lot to me. I'll see you in my next one. 'Til then, stay happy and healthy <33

-Mari 🌻