Thank You For The Venom (Frerard)

17 - For the last night I lie

17 - For the last night I lie

It was the last night of tour.

Gerard finished his beer in record speed and threw it into the nearby bin. He hadn't had a lot to drink yet, but he'd been doing bumps of coke for the past hour or so, and there was still time for at least one more hit before they went onstage.

Frank had been doing some sort of interview, and then everyone had been packing up their stuff on the bus ready for flying to Japan, so the others hadn't really been keeping close enough an eye on him to notice his frequent bathroom trips.

Mikey had definitely noticed his hands shaking when he was applying his stage makeup. He was trying to do his eyeliner now, using all his strength to keep a steady hand as he rolled the pencil against his waterline before smudging it the perfect amount.

"You doing okay, Gee?" he asked quietly as he flat ironed his hair.

"Of course" Gerard rushed "just the last show of tour, gotta be a good one y'know?"

"It's always a good one" Mikey frowned "you know that, right? You're always incredible up there."

"Thanks Mikes" he gave him his best reassuring grin "so are you."

He'd finished his eyeliner by this point, and leaned back to look at his reflection in the shitty bus mirror. He was happy enough, and practised his most convincing smile before he turned and grabbed his jacket, shrugging it on.

He'd been feeling so fucking low all day, but the coke and beer was starting to take effect, and he knew he'd have enough energy to see himself through the show. The kids in the crowd needed him to be strong, even when he felt at his weakest.

Ray, Frank and Bob were already in the venue, so he waited for Mikey outside the front of the bus, lighting a cigarette to pass the time.

The venue was always a buzz of excitement and mania before shows, but he could tell it was the last night. Everyone was excited for the wrap party, and sad that it was over too. Some were excited to get home to their loved ones, others dreading the mundane life back home off the road.

Gerard wasn't sure how he felt. The tour had certainly been a rocky one - everything that had happened with Bert, his spiralling, Frank.

Frank. They had Tokyo next, but what would happen after that? He hated the thought of returning to his flat in Jersey and sleeping alone again. He hated to think how much he'd end up drinking without Frank there to distract him and pull him away to bed. And he especially hated how scared he was that things would change off the road. He knew Frank cared for him deeply, but would it be enough to put up with all his shit?

"Ready" Mikey snapped him out of his thoughts when he appeared next to him, and Gerard dropped the remains of his cigarette onto the floor, stomping it out with his worn boot.

When they got to their dressing room they found Brian had beaten them there, and was talking to Ray. Bob and Frank were sat on the sofa. Frank had done his own makeup, and Gerard loved how amazing he looked with his eyes rimmed in red, the crosses drawn on in thick eyeliner over each eye. His hair was getting long and falling into his face, and he had to hold back the temptation to just cross the room and brush it away, cup his whole face in his hand and-

"Gerard! Mikey!" Brian was pulling him in for a hug then, distracting his wandering mind.

"Hey Brian" he grinned, trying to resist the restlessness surging through his body.

"I was just saying to Ray what an amazing tour this has been. I think we could probably increase the production budget for the next one too-"

"Can we get pyro?" Frank immediately piped up "you know how much I want pyro Brian."