Consequences

four

Ella

"I- I can't," Grayson stutters.

I scoff.

"You can't or you won't?" I snap.

He is making me angry right now.

"You've already made my life hell, Gray. What else do you need?" I yell, tears starting to roll down my cheeks.

I can't take it anymore. I'm so done with him.

"Were the three years of our marriage not enough for you to play with me?" I yell, not giving a damn how he reacts.

"I love you, Ella. I can't lose you," he whispers but somehow his words reaches me.

"News flash, Gray. You've already lost me," I snap again but his reaction manages to surprise me. There's this flash of regret and hurt in his eyes.

I internally roll my eyes. Why would he be hurt? He should be happy he played me well.

A sob escape my lips as the worst memories make their way back. Memories of the time I used to wait for him but he won't come home; memories of me crying myself to sleep after seeing his pictures in the social media with whores clinging to him; memories of me hoping he would come on my birthdays to surprise me; memories of his rudeness and distant behaviour.

"I'm sorry, Ella. I know I don't deserve you but I can't live without you. I was so broken after Ashton's death. I didn't want to seem weak so I closed myself off. I stopped caring. I was scared of losing everyone else. I was scared of losing you too," he pauses and sighs, a tear rolling down his perfect golden eyes, "I'm sorry."

"I waited. I waited day and night hoping you would come back," I say, my voice cracking, "I wished you to be there with me. But guess what? You were busy drinking and whoring around all that time."

My pitch gets higher as more and more anger and frustration consumes me, "Do you know how it feels to sit in the middle of people who're pitying you? Do you know how it feels to face your worst days with no one beside you? Do you know how it feels to be left behind by the only love of your life?" I yell and boy, it feels so good pulling it off my chest.

"Two years, Gray," I look him in the eye, "I've waited two long years for you. I won't any longer."

"Don't do this, Ella," he cries, pain evident in his voice.

I'm not trusting him again. I won't let him play with my feelings now.

I take a deep breath and wipe my tears off.

"I can't give you what you want anyway," I say, my tone cold and my face void of any emotions, "It's better for us to break apart. The next date for trials is next month."

It's breaking me inside. But I can't. I can't let Grayson hurt me anymore. I can't give him what he's always wanted. I can't give him a family he's always longed for.

"What do you mean you can't give me what I want?" He asks furrowing his eyebrows.

I shake my head and look down at my hands, tears falling down, "I can not conceive again."

Silence. That's all I here.

I froze as Grayson cups my face with his hands and pulls me to him smashing his lips on mine after a long moment of silence.

The second I register his reaction, I push him away and without any hesitation my hand is flying to his face.

"Stay away from me. I don't fucking need your pity," I snap and run back to my room, locking myself in and bawling my eyes out.

———

So, I know it's not very good and it's short. B'cause man, I'm lazy.!

But still, how was it?