Facing the Darkness ~ Zelink Modern AU

Ghost

I stand up from my coach after not sleeping all night then I walk to school the day after the incident. I should be skipping right now but. I just cant think at all. Even walking hurts mentally. But at the shape I am. Itll be my luck to hit a car. Pfft actually let's hope that happens.

I'll finally be taken off this damn earth and be at ease. Not stressed not hurt. Just gone. I mean it doesnt matter that much anyway. Its not like I have any friends here. Zelda uses me as popularity status.

Durak and ravoli we dont even talk that much unless outside of school. It really wouldn't hurt that much if I were to leave this planet. My mom and dad are gone. At the moment I feel like I'm at deaths doors. I just dont know anyomre.

I get to the parking lot. Unfortunately I didnt get hit by a car. I wore a way different outfit then usual. A black hoodie with black Jean's. Maybe I wont be seen today. Thatll help me calm down. I dont know anymore. Am I sad, mad, confused, hurt. It's just to many enotions.

I stumble into my class room and go to my seat and sit down forcefully. Slamming my head into my arms. I want to cry so bad. I want to cry. But I cant, I dont know why. But it would be to embarrassing. I need a break. From school... reality... actually I think life itself.

Zelda walked in. And saw me, she must think I'm pathetic. That's probably it because she didnt even say hey. I mean. We arent friends again so why would she say hey. I mean friends say hey.

The school bell rings and the class eventually becomes filled up. Everyone doing work and talking. I just sit there. As though I've seen a ghost... no I've seen something worse. A shell of a ghost. I dead body. Tch, please just no one talk to me. I can just say I have a huge headache. But that means social interaction. And I ain't down.

Its lunch. I stand up but not to go to lunch to go home. I start walking until I get near the front door. Then someone walks behind me and grabs my arm. Its strong is it durak. Yea. I turn around. "What?" I say. Trying to be as quiet as possible. "Dude are you okay. You look like you saw a ghost man".

I look at him, and tears fill my eyes. "No. I saw something worse. Please dont tell anyone. I dont want people to think I'm weak. My mom... committed suicide while I was at the skate park yesterday. When I got home. I walked in and then I saw her"

I start crying now. Full on crying. Fuck i just blew my cover. He looked at me. "Hey man its gonna be fine. You just gotta believe. Were friends you know. You ain't goin through this stuff alone. If you need to talk then talk. I'm here for you man. And I can guaranty you that others are there to."

"It... it was my fault, she messaged me to come home but all I did was ignore you. This is all my fault. I dont wanna live. I want this pain to be over. Both my parents are dead now. And all I feel is. Hatred to this world. Sadness and a hole bunch of other things. It's just hard."

Durak gives me a hug. Like a calm down type hug. "Its gonna be hard. But right now. In your life. You gotta find a way to smile. That's the hardest thing bout losing someone. As soon as you give up on life. You lose your way. How bout dis. This weekend I'm throwing a party. You come and get your mind off things for awhile. There will be cute girls and beer"

I nod. "Yea I'll come" I wipe my eyes. And put on a fake smile. One of the fakest ones I've ever did but itll do. I keep my hood up for the whole day. I'm just happy the weekend is tomorrow. Maybe hes right. Maybe all I need to do is smile"

I go to the lunch table and sit with durak and stuff. They all laugh and I try to join along. His words echoed in my mind though. Right now all I need to do is find a way to smile. Thatll be good I guess.

I try cracking a few jokes with them. This is kinda fun. This is really fun. For the first time. I got my mind off the incident.

((Extra long chapter for tonight.))