𝐑𝐄𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐃 / bungō stray dogs x reader anthology

𝐨𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮 𝐝𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢 ✧ 𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐭 𝐢𝐢

April 7th 2020 / requested by my constant need to break everyone's expectations / The Idiot - The ability to instantly tell whenever a person is lying or being fully honest, however, what is the truth and what is a lie the person [automatically] cannot discern / 700 Words

✧ ｡ﾟ✐.*ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* ✎｡:*ﾟ

You had always hated your ability. For it was the most useless of things. After all, what is the point of being able to discern lies from truth, if you can't even tell which is which? You could do so now with ease, however, it took time to learn how to do so. It took broken hearts and shattered trust, it took what felt like a lifetime of sorrow.

And still, to live your life without regrets may not be something you could do, but at the very least you had few. A small mishap from childhood, one now resolved, so perhaps it was possible. But letting go took time, as did moving on after all Dazai was the perfect example of that.

You had met when you were spending a year off before college to earn money, a year older than him, working at a bar in the backends of Yokohama. Not what you expected of life. But Dazai had come crashing into your life like some great catalyst from the gods screaming at you to get your shit together, rather ironic really.

He was reckless, a womanizer, he had a silver tongue and blood on his hands; and you were just the bartender at his regular place to get blackout drunk. How funny that you two clicked, nights spent talking over the bar, making sure someone picked him up when he would eventually pass out, listening to either Sakunosuke's thank or Nakahara's grumbles as one of the two lugged the executive home.

You never meant to feel something more than friendship.

Unfortunately for you, life had a habit of flipping you off and doing the exact opposite of your desire

But you wouldn't call it love. Maybe a desire to have a label, to be called friends, nothing more nothing less. But maybe you did love him at one point, it didn't matter now though.

Because he pushed you away, he showed you his ugliest sides, in hope that you would turn and run, but when you did leave it ironically had nothing to do with him. No, your mother had passed, and so you had flown to your hometown to be present at her funeral, having moved to Japan with your father after your parent's divorce.

But despite the morbid circumstances, it was oddly pleasant to visit your hometown once more, and the pleasant coincidence of meeting an old friend shortly after was only a bonus.

It only escalated from there.

Catching up over tea and coffee later that week, each learning the other was Gifted, and eventually, you left with a renewed, perhaps not friendship, but certainly a partnership of sorts as you tucked your friend's business card into your pocket.

And as we all know, so much can happen in four years.

Because you grew closer as you developed a cover story of a journalist, agreeing to help him and his organization. It was maybe one too many late nights and one to many glasses of whiskey that led to a perhaps rushed confession, and no dear reader there was no drunken sex that night, rather a chocking on sobs as you perhaps became a bit too honest with your old friend.

But he still stayed, he never tried to push you away, and while he showed you his worst sides, it was never to shove you out of his life. And now a promise ring glistened on your finger as you smiled to the detective, asking questions pertaining to the murder a few feet away.

Yet you knew all the answers, you were lying through your teeth, and you ignored Dazai's stare. You ignored your nagging conscience because you had a home, a family, somewhere you were loved.

Because even if you would leave this life with regrets, once more meeting and falling in love with Fyodor Dostoyevsky would never be one of them.