Breaking Down the Wall

Alone

Phana's POV

Yo walked away with Nate and Ming, leaving me standing alone. I'd missed every opportunity to spend time with Yo today. I'd walked over to him during the break hoping to ask him to drive home with me to get dinner, but when Ming whispered in his ear, making Yo laugh, I'd blurted out, "I'm hungry." Everyone just stared at me like I was a lunatic until Yo grabbed me a snack from his bag. When Ging sent me to pick up the food boxes, all my hopes of eating with Yo had vanished. I'd stayed here all during practice, watching Yo, only to be politely declined when I offered him a ride home. Nate had beat me to it. Between Ming, Forth, Nate, and that mystery guy on the phone, how was I ever supposed to spend time with my Yo?

I can only hope to get more of an opportunity at the beach. I thought for a moment, then it came to me. Brilliant. Yo was still my servant, I'd ask him to wake me up in the morning and I'd drive him to meet the buses. I didn't have Yo's number, so I'd have to go to his room. I could talk to him before he went to bed. Maybe he'd even invite me into his room. Though getting Yo alone in a room with a bed might be too much temptation for me, I was willing to take the risk.

I was maybe ten minutes behind Yo when I drove to my dorms. I didn't want to be too late and find Yo already asleep. I hurried up to his dorms, stopping to check my breath and fix my hair.

"P'Pha?" Yo answered the door, looking sleepy. "Is something wrong?"

I stopped short for just a moment. That was the first time he'd called me by my name. I stared at him, savoring the moment, until he cleared his throat.

"I need you to wake me up in the morning," I said. Getting closer, I hoped he'd give way so I could step inside. "Are you done packing?"

"Don't you have an alarm?" Yo asked, not moving from his position in front of the door.

"Yes, but I have a hard time getting up if I don't have classes," I said, coming up with a good excuse. I looked into his room, trying to edge my way inside, "Do you want me to check your bags?"

"Don't worry, P'Pha. I'm already packed," Yo said, blocking my entrance. "I'll wake you up at 8 AM, so you'll have time to get ready."

"Okay, thanks N'Yo," I said, giving up. He obviously wanted to sleep, so I wasn't getting into his room tonight. "I'll give you a ride in the morning."

"It's okay, Ai'Ming will pick me up," Yo said. "You only have two seats and P'Pring might need a ride."

Shit.

"Pring isn't coming," I said hurriedly. "I'll take you."

Yo looked at me for a moment, probably wondering if he could trust me to do what I promised. So far, everything I've done has left a bad impression, so I'm sure it will take some time for me to show him that I meant what I said.

"Okay, P'Pha," Yo finally said, he looked unconvinced, but I would prove I could be trusted.

"Okay, see you in the morning," I said, happy with my small victory. He closed the door and I walked back down to my room.

Yo's POV

When I finally got home, I took a quick shower and finished my packing. Then I took the pictures out of my backpack and looked at them closely. I had two pictures of Pha left on my Wall of Shame. I knew it was time I took them down, but it was still painful to give up on something that had been so important to me for such a long time.

I took the two frames down, removed the backs, and pulled out my remaining pictures of Pha. I stared at them for a few more minutes, thinking. Pha hadn't been as unkind to me for the last couple of days, but I didn't even want to remember his behavior before that. He was rude, condescending, and even a little violent. I know Joss shouldn't have been yelling at him that night, but he actually kind of deserved it.

Since I'd come to the university, I'd forgiven Pha for his bad behavior because I never thought it was important if he ever liked me back. I know I'll keep forgiving him, that's the kind of person I want to be, but I'm not going to continue chasing someone that just ends up making me unhappy. I look over at the picture of Forth with his arm around me and I can feel a blush start on my cheeks. I think it's time to see where my feelings take me.

I leave the last two pictures of Pha laying on my bed. The picture of my fairy angels and the picture of my friends, Suthee, Nate, and Ming, go into the two empty frames. I'm thinking it's time to lay down to go to bed when I hear knocking on my door.

It was Pha. We talked for a few minutes and made plans for him to take me to the buses in the morning. I wasn't sure he would actually take me, but I figured I could call a taxi or ask Nate if Pha decided to take someone else again. I sent a text to Ming, telling him about the change to our morning plans, threw away the last two pictures of Pha, and went to bed.

Author's Note: I know the last part (Yo's POV) of this chapter was a little boring. I wanted to make sure that Yo was moving forward. Getting rid of Pha's pictures is just an outside action that shows how he is changing inside. Letting go of the past can be painful, but it can also be liberating. Even if Pha and Yo get together (and I promise, in at least one version of this story, they will get together), I want to make sure that Yo let's go of the pain and accepts that he's going to be okay with or without Pha.