ᴀᴘʜʀᴏᴅɪᴛᴇ // $ᴜɪᴄɪᴅᴇʙᴏʏ$

Chapter Forty

SCOTT

Aphrodite had always been able to understand me. I knew that, otherwise I would have never spoken with her to the extent I had. But as I looked at her now, as I heard her words, I knew Aphrodite understood things some people would never be able to fully grasp. I wondered if it was her past that had given her that understanding, or if she was simply bred to think almost just like me. I wondered how it would be to keep her around for a long time, wondered if she would accept this life as her own.

Then I remembered that Aphrodite was in love with my cousin. I remembered that Aphrodite was now free from me and could do whatever she wanted. I once told her that she belonged to me. I oddly felt that she was no longer mine.

I couldn't decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

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APHRODITE

I didn't know what to do while Scott was away. I refused to stay in his room and sit on his bed, idly twiddling my thumbs as I patiently waited for him to return. I couldn't do something like that because I wasn't that kind of woman, the kind to wait around for the man to come back so I could have my fill again like the obedient little lover. And I wasn't Scott's lover anyway.

Well... I guess I kind of was Scott's lover now, but I wouldn't think too hard about it, wouldn't go that far into the reality of it all. I didn't want to use that term. If Scott saw me as his lover now, or anyone else for that matter, since we hadn't been particularly discreet when I returned last night, then that was their own issue. As for me and my own thought process, I wouldn't refer to myself as his lover because I didn't want to feel... whatever it was that I didn't want to feel. So instead of waiting around for him, I finished washing and dressing, sliding on a black long sleeved shirt with navy blue skinny jeans, and decided to go see what had become of my old room, smacking my lips together after I painted them a deep red.

I knew I was drawn to Scott, knew that I had felt unacceptable attraction for him ever since the first day he kidnapped me in the hotel room. I even thought he was sort of attractive the first time I met him at Ari's house. I didn't really relate well to people; knew my lack of friends came from that. But when I started to get to know Scott better, started to understand exactly what kind of man he was, I had felt a certain pull to him. I had lost sleep over the long nights I lied in bed during my captivity, wondering if someone could do the things that Scott did and still be perfectly sane. Aristos had schizophrenia, and somehow that was a good enough explanation for me as to why he did the certain things he did. But Scott did the same things, almost acted the same way Aristos did, but in his own way. Was Scott crazy too? Was I crazy? Maybe all three of us were insane. I guessed we were, and I guessed I was okay with that.

And now that I was sleeping with Scott I felt a different kind of pull, one that had everything to do with the physical because of the attraction I had tried to deny. And I was still okay with it because it seemed to be the only thing that had been worth it in my long list of regrets in life.

My black Vans squeaked on the concrete as I walked inside my old room, discovered it exactly how I left it, save for my things. The door was still broken from Scott slamming it, my bed still unmade since the last night I slept there, and the desk looked the same too. I shivered in the small room and decided to head back to my things in Scott's room so I could retrieve my light jacket, and then I thought maybe I would take a walk outside.

I walked out of the room to find the lights all shut off when they weren't before, and the warehouse suddenly felt much bigger, much darker, much colder, and so much quieter than usual. I knew that no one was around, I assumed because they left with Scott to go do whatever it was they had to do. I wondered if maybe the power went out. But as I walked along slowly, my arms folded for warmth and my shoes making the only sound I could hear, I suddenly felt that maybe I wasn't as alone as I thought.